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Why am I so scared?

Posted by Rocket, 15 October 2015 · 1180 views

Why am I so scared to start dating?

More so, why does it have to be so hard to go out and meet people? I'm an introvert, being in large groups or big social situations is not me. I don't like going to bars or clubs or whatever it is you cool kids do these days.

Why am I so scared of joining a dating site? Like a legit dating site? I was on fucking tinder for months, I met a guy, we dated for a month or two, it wasn't a big deal. But why am I so scared to join eharmony, match, or one of those other dating places? How do you meet people to date?? I feel so lost in this aspect of life.

I have no problem meeting guys online, meeting them in person, falling in love with them. None have been through dating sites, just random online forums where friends become more.

I'm almost 30 fucking years old, I'm not getting any younger. I'm lonely, I need a partner, I want a partner. I'm tired of putting effort into people who put zero effort into me. I want to be swept off my feet, I want someone to make a grand gesture for me.

I gave up my life once, I moved to another country, I am always the one giving things up and working way harder than the other person.

I'm tired. I'm hormonal. I'm lonely. I just don't want to be alone anymore.

Being an insecure adult sucks.

iCarly

Oct 15 2015 05:03 PM

I met my girlfriend randomly on facebook.

two years later and we're working on my immigration so we can move in together.

Someone might just come along for you too really, you just have to be open when meeting new people really, that's how I've usually done it anyway.

I don't know if that really helps you or not, but I hope so.

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Coops

Oct 16 2015 03:23 AM

I understand why you feel alone. But you have us here.

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Elindoril

Oct 17 2015 07:38 PM

You're already on a dating site.

neocodex.us

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Rocket

Oct 19 2015 10:03 AM

You're already on a dating site.

neocodex.us

lol everyone here already knows i'm batshit crazy, good luck with that rocket.

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dddbliss

Oct 21 2015 04:54 PM

Like Aria said, just be open to the possibility, and it will happen. Being scared is okay, letting being scared keep you from dating is something that isn't as okay.

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Amythistle

Oct 22 2015 05:48 PM

Believe me, I UNDERSTAND! I'm very similar. I am very introverted except for online. I actually signed up for an online dating site (Match) and it wasn't as bad as I expected. You still get to chat and message before meeting. I never got that far. Ironically, chatting with people helped me realize I didn't want anyone in my life in that capacity. I'd say to sign up during one of the "extended free trials" . Then you can see what it's like without spending any money. But, regardless, just know you ARE worth it, and it WILL happen one day!

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ellemenno

Dec 24 2015 01:03 AM

You made this post like, two months ago... But it caught my attention because I'm in a similar boat. I think I've teetered over the edge, though, and I have given up and accepted that I will just die alone, with a sink full of dishes, and maybe 8 cats. (Not saying you'll share my fate! This is just where I am now... Like a cautionary tale!) I tried eHarmony... Sorry, but EFF that site and almost everything about it. They kicked me off after a few hours because I stated that I lived in Germany, paid with an American debit card, and signed up from Bulgaria - where I was legitimately working at the time. I even sent them a copy of my NATO orders proving my innocence - and they never replied... And they kept my ungodly high registration & matching fee of $150. At any rate, please keep us/me updated! I'd love to chat and maybe cry over some hot tea someday!