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My Very Bad Kinda V-Day Poems

Posted by KyloRen, 14 February 2017 · 280 views

valentines day v-day bad poetry fangirling star wars

So I got bored in class and decided to write a whole bunch of Star Wars themed really bad V-day poems. They're in the theme and poetic style of the classic "roses are red" poems but I wouldn't directly call them love poems. I'd give the names of who the poem is for, but I think it's pretty obvious.


 

My suit is Black
I'm on the attack
My Kids tried to kill me
At least my grandson is with me
-----------------

 

Lightsabers are Red
Grandpa is dead
I talk to his helmet
While crying in bed
--------


My hair is Red
Ren's a whiny bitch
I love my cat Millicent
So I bought her catnip.
---------


My lightsaber is Red
A jedi's is blue
I hate everything
Especially Luke


------------
My armor is Chrome
Starkiller Base is my home
FN-2187 Deserted
So I need to hurt 'em.


--------
My name is Matt
Kylo Ren has an 8 pack
He's totally shredded
So I molded myself after that
---------
Hi I'm Matt
Kylo Ren has an 8 pack
I saw him in the shower
He's got some great power


------


Lightsabers are red


Some are blue


I've got a scarred head


I'm a creep too


-----


I like little boys


I take them for the Order


One is a knight


The others are fodder


--------


My lasers are showcased


As I hurtle through space


I'm the Death Star recreation


Kylo's Starkiller Base


---------------


The fangirls love me


My hair is fluffy


I'm incredibly sexy


So they all want to fuck me






*coffee house snaps*

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the second and last one lol

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