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Abradix Pickup Lines


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#1 Abradix

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 07:06 PM

So uhhh.... Do you know how heavy a polar bear is?

Heavy enough to break the ice.

Works 60% of the time, every time.

#2 Wil

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 07:07 PM

So uhhh.... Do you know how heavy a polar bear is?

Heavy enough to break the ice.

Works 60% of the time, every time.

So uhhh.... Does this napkin smell like chloroform?

Yes?

Works 100% of the time, every time.

#3 Roxi

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 07:18 PM

So uhhh.... Does this napkin smell like chloroform?

Yes?

Works 100% of the time, every time.


That's a good one! You made me lol.

#4 Abradix

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 07:22 PM

Oh my god! Is that top felt?!

.....Would you like it to be?

Works 0% of the time. Never.

#5 Guest_Marshmallow_*

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 07:22 PM

Works 60% of the time, every time.

Gah...English pet peeve. 60% can't be every time. :p

#6 Wil

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 07:23 PM

Oh my god! Is that top felt?!

.....Would you like it to be?

Works 0% of the time. Never.

Really? That's weird. I have a 33% rate. Must have something to do with the weather.

#7 Guest_Marshmallow_*

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 07:24 PM

lol. I like the felt joke though. ;)

#8 Abradix

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 07:26 PM

Gah...English pet peeve. 60% can't be every time. :p



Ribs. I had ribs for lunch, thats why I'm doing this.


Posted Image


#9 Puppetmaster

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 07:59 PM

Hey, nice shoes... bet they'd look much better in my pants.

Are you from heaven? 'Cause I've got an erection!

[courtesy of Robot Chicken]

#10 neobrah

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 09:58 PM

Hey, nice shoes... bet they'd look much better in my pants.

Are you from heaven? 'Cause I've got an erection!

[courtesy of Robot Chicken]


You: Hey do you need help with your shoes?

Her: No why?

You: I don't want you falling for anyone else ; )

ZINGGGG

#11 Noitidart

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 10:46 PM

So uhhh.... Does this napkin smell like chloroform?

Yes?

Works 100% of the time, every time.

HAHAHA LOVE THIS!!!

Hey, nice shoes... bet they'd look much better in my pants.

Are you from heaven? 'Cause I've got an erection!

[courtesy of Robot Chicken]

Those are both utterly ridiculous. 2nd one more so. :doh: haha

#12 Abradix

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 10:51 PM

Oldie but a goodie: DAYUM GIRL!! Do you wash them pants in Windex? Cause I can totally see myself in 'em.

#13 neobrah

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 11:05 PM

i've had a crush on you for years...


works best on facebook, msn, text messages. works about 9 times out of 10

#14 jaredennisclark

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Posted 20 January 2011 - 11:36 PM

When do the rape jokes start?

#15 Abradix

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 12:05 AM

When do the rape jokes start?


If thats what your into...

"Hay gurl letz haev teh seckx"
"Umm... How about no?"
"HOWZ BOUT YUS!?!1"
*club*
*BAM*
*rape*

Its not a laughing matter :|

#16 jcrboy

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 12:34 AM

Its not a laughing matter :|

*club*


You can't have it both ways.


#17 Abradix

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 01:20 AM


You can't have it both ways.


<insert obligatory comment about bisexuality>

#18 neobrah

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 12:01 PM

I think we need some more actual pick up lines for the lulz

Unfortunately i'm fresh out of rape jokes =p

#19 Abradix

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 12:06 PM

*turn to girl sitting next to me in bar* I'm not really this tall. I'm just sitting on my wallet.

#20 Icey Defeat

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 12:07 PM

Your name must be Severus Severus, because you're making my prince full blood.

#21 neobrah

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 01:11 PM

Your name must be Severus Severus, because you're making my prince full blood.


I'm like Oliver Wood, I'm a keeper.

#22 Icey Defeat

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 01:15 PM

My wands are always a perfect fit, go ahead, give it a wave.

#23 Tsunade

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 01:15 PM

Your name must be Severus Severus, because you're making my prince full blood.


If I were to look into the Mirror of Erised, I'd see the two of us together.

#24 artificial

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 01:16 PM

Fuck me if I'm wrong, but is your name Belinda?

#25 Icey Defeat

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Posted 21 January 2011 - 01:17 PM

I like pokemon, will you have sex with me?


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