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Homeschool vs Public School vs Private School


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#1 Maeghan

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 07:00 AM

As Lily gets older and I start looking into preschools and such,
Ive become increasingly interested in home schooling her.

What are your experiences with it?
Did you do it? Did you enjoy it? Did you hate it? Why wouldnt you?

#2 Yung

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 07:07 AM

I was home schooled until my Sophomore year. I found that school work in Public School was much easier due to all my time being home schooled I had an easier time than my classmates in staying motivated in my studies.

I did it only once or twice a week though as it allowed a lot of flexibility for pursuing other interests. I enjoyed it but there is a clear lack of social interactions that I had to adjust to once I was in Public schools. I would only recommend home schooling until the 6th grade. After that it would be best for social interactions to allow your kids to have at least a year or two in Public schools then let them choose which they prefer.

#3 Maeghan

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 07:22 AM

Thats kind of the route Im thinking of.
Homeschooling for the elementry years and then allowing her to decide for middle school and high school.

My biggest worry is what she will be introduced to in her young years.
Im really afraid of her developing an early interest in boys, clothes, material things, etc.

I dont want her to come home in 3rd grade and tell me she now has a boyfriend. I think children, especially little girls, are exposed to these things at a very very young age and its inappropriate. I'd prefur her to stay a little girl for as long as possible.

That and I think there's more to learn OUTSIDE of the classroom than inside.
I learned better going to museums and seeing the art of ancient cultures then reading about them in text books. This applies to nearly every school subject.



#4 Kauvara

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 07:41 AM

Public school is a bitch. I LOVE learning, so getting my school work and home work done was never a problem. I was the student that was getting 100's constantly and never had anything below an A.
Then....high school. I hated it so much I started missing lots of school, just because I didn't want to be around the annoying as shit kids that went to my school. I could rant for hours about how retarded those kids were, but I'll spare you all the novel. :p

I'm sure every high school has it's fair share of drama and assholes, but holy shit. I never did anything to hurt anyone, idk if they were jealous or what, but girls liked to talk MASSIVE shit about me. I was always so quiet, and like I've mentioned before, people ALWAYS take it the wrong way. Every rumor imaginable was circulated about me - everything from "she's an STD ridden whore" to "I bet she sucks the teachers dick for those good grades. I study SO HARD and I don't even do that well." Yea right. The craziest thing that ever happened, though, was during gym a girl stole my phone out of the locker room and (pretending to be me) actually broke up with my boyfriend, and then threw it in the trash. People hated me, and I have no idea why. :/
Anyways, obviously my grades started slipping a little, so everyone assumed I was just a lazy pot head who didn't want to go to school....absolute bullshit.
Then they'd all be surprised when I'd roll in and get a higher grade than everyone else on the tests. -_-
I'm so glad I pushed myself to keep going so I could graduate. By the end of high school I had missed well over 200 days....I'm really surprised I wasn't kicked out.


***I forgot to add, I lived in a really ghetto area when I was in high school. I went to two different schools in the area, and both were the same. Pretty much everyone that lived in that place was an asshole. It was small and there were several big families that ran the area.
When I was younger, I went to two different junior highs. One was in a nice area, one was in a not so nice area, that was known for being troublesome. The first was decent, and I had no problems. I actually won first place in a D.A.R.E competition - the whole school had to write an essay on why you shouldn't do drugs and the best essay was to be read in the assembly by the student who wrote it. Lucky shy ass me had to read my essay in front of a 2,000 kid school, and their parents. I won a cool medal though. The second, however, is where I had a lot of "firsts," and even got suspended at one point. The kids there were all a horrible influence and everyone always got in a lot of trouble. I may be analyzing this a bit too closely, but from my experience, ghetto areas have the worst public schools, just something you may want to consider if you ever end up in a place like that. :p

Edited by Jabberwock, 08 February 2012 - 10:51 AM.


#5 redlion

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 08:34 AM

I dated a girl in high school who was home schooled until 7th grade. She was one of the most intelligent and intriguing people I ever met, although I don't know how much of that was due to home schooling. She breezed through high school, whereas I was almost burned out by the time I finished. Burned out in high school, then immediately enrolled in university... what a fucked up life children lead these days.

On the other hand, I know a couple really fucked up home schooled children. Don't take this the wrong way, but if you're in any way biased in your presentation of educational materials, it will come out in your children. Best to let a private tutor work in subjects you have no interest/experience in.

This also applies to subjects outside of those taught in school. Home schooled children aren't socialized in the same ways as private or public school kids - you the parent are the major social outlet, which can be good and bad. The fucked up kids I mentioned were fucked up not because they weren't intelligent, but because they were racist bigots in spite of their intelligence.

#6 Random

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 09:23 AM

Private Catholic elementary school.
Private Catholic all boys high school.
Currently at Private Catholic college.

I enjoyed all of them thoroughly and got a great education. Religion was never really forced upon me for practice, only for education.

#7 Turnip

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 10:07 AM

Please, whatever you do, don't let your daughter do homeschooling for the final years of high school, or change schools every year :( It really, REALLY fucks with their education, like making it inconsistent and whatnot. I left high school in year 9 to do homeschool, worked on things at home, blah blah and then had nothing to do for two years. When the time came for me to get my GCSEs, I called up pretty much every fucking school in the county to see if I could take at least my Maths, English and Art (maybe ICT) GCSEs but they pretty much told me to fuck off because ~*oohhh, you're homeschooled, that means you haven't been in a school before or are retarded hahahah no*~.
I loved those two or so years of homeschooling though!!!! Mostly because uhm
mom let me go on the computer constantly and never do any work >w> And to be honest, after finding and joining some online projects/IRC, I've had a lot of great experiences and friendships, and have learnt more "useful" things/ones that I can use irl on here compared to all the years I wasted in school~

And so, after finally finding a place that would let me sit those exams, I was only able to do Maths and English. Nothing else.And since every college around here requires at least 5 GCSEs, and I'm unable to take ones other than Maths and English, I can't go and do things to help me with getting a job/career! Wooo.




I'm sure homeschooling is fine if you do it when your child is young though! Make sure you join a homeschooling group so Lily has at least some social interactions and friends etc :3
If you can, try and find a montessori school in your area! I went to one in 1st and 2nd grade, and my god, those two years there were the best ever~ The way they teach maths and other things is really great and easy to understand :) It can be pretty expensive, but it's damn worth it~

Spoilers I haven't been in the same school for more than two years in my entire life, thanks family/income/bullying problems! Wooooo.... ;_;

Edited by Turnip, 08 February 2012 - 10:10 AM.


#8 Ellipses

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 10:20 AM

Theres so much that needs to be learned that home-schooling can never provide. Anyone can go on and list the intangible things that home-schooling fails to provide.

The "I was homeschooled and public school was super easy for me" is a pretty common instance I guess for it to be recurring so much. I wouldn't make the decision based on apparent academic superiority of home-schooling. Those who were homeschooled until high school and had an easy time in high school doesn't necessary mean home-schooling is the reason for that. MANY colleges now have an acceptance rate of undergraduate with over a 4.0 GPA(different colleges and such calculate overall GPA differently but that doesn't change the fact that the average GPA of the admitted glass is much above a 4.0) which means that all those kids had a relatively easy time in high school too. Which seems to imply that high school isn't easy cause home-schooling prepared them but rather high school is just easy in general.

#9 Freidmont

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 11:32 AM

I've been to homeschool, private and public school. I think homeschool is best in the younger years, and then private school when you get to grade school level. It all depends on what your values are, and whether you want the state indoctrinating your children from a young age. Of course, time is also a big issue. The accusation that homeschooled students are socially inept is a complete myth in my experience. When I was younger, I was part of homeschool groups that met regularly and went on activities and such. I would argue that many homeschoolers are more socially accepting, because they hang out with a more diverse crowd than at a public school, and often their parents teach them better manners.

Obviously when you get older there are courses that parent(s) are not going to have the experience or understanding to teach. At this point I think a private school is the best option. They have a much higher standard of education and structure than public schools, and in my experience the teachers care more about their students. That's not to say there aren't great teachers working in public schools, there's just less of them. Of course, not all parents can afford to pay for a private school (and we're required to pay for public school whether we use it or not). When my parents had other children, they could no longer afford to keep me in private school so I went to high school. While I did enjoy the lack of discipline compared to private school, I was not challenged by the classes at all. I started hanging out with some of the 'cool' kids and smoking pot. By the end of senior year, I was stoned every day, put almost no effort into my homework, slept through several classes, and still managed to breeze through with almost all A's.

Before I have children, I'm going to make sure I'm financially stable enough to put them in a good private school. The developmental years are pivotal in a young person's character and wellbeing, so I'm going to make sure no expense is spared in that regard. The same applies to avoiding GMO's and hormones etc. etc. by eating organic (something that I'm trying to change my diet to currently).

#10 Bone

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 12:11 PM

If you're going to choose public, pull some strings and get her into some sort of advanced/accelerated/gifted program. Being thrown in to attempt to learn with the general population is too risky (in every sense of the word).

If you decide to homeschool, I would also recommend having her to go a public/private high school.

In any case, I hope you're not a religious wingnut.

#11 Boggart

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 12:33 PM

I went to public school till grade 6 and hated it. I just didn't fit in 'cause I wasn't retarded. I was the top of all my classes, didn't enjoy physically abusing other people, plus I was fat. So that didn't help the situation

I went to a very religious high school (Mennonite to be exact) and I loved it. I admit that I was kind of a dick, but they sorta knocked it out of me within a few months/end of the first year. Sadly I was no longer the top of my classes, but I was still in the higher percentile :p

My sister, on the other hand, went to public school all her life and she turned out well (she's in her last year of pharmacy).

Then again, we're both Asian so failure is not an option.

#12 Sweeney

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 01:03 PM

Don't homeschool your child. You're not a trained teacher. You're not even a trained parent.
Every parent thinks they know what's best for their child, but the overwhelming majority of them don't.
Would you take your child to an untrained doctor when they were sick?
Then why would you entrust someone who has next to no idea what they're doing teach your child in her most formative years?

#13 Dazz

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 01:04 PM

I went to public school and to be honest if I had the chance I wouldn't change it, it went beyond just education it taught me how to interact with everyone, the chavs, the posh tots...etc. I went to the school that everyone who had been expelled from other schools came to but hell it's made me a lot more street smart and wittier, and if you're worried about your child's protection well I can safely say I've never been in a fight in my life but I made it that way. Although I'm not entirely sure how different the schools in England are from those elsewhere.

#14 Kat

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 01:36 PM

Having been through all three, I would personally choose private school for my child. Homeschool was stupid since my parents are stupid. I liked sleeping in of course, but I didn't learn anything. Public school is just how everyone says it is, terrible. I did have some good times there, but I had a great time at private school too. I actually learned things there and was given far more opportunities that I would have gotten in public school. I just wish I would have gone there for all my schooling instead of jumping around.
if you pick something, please stick with it. It's worse to jump around places, screw up their transcript, and make them leave their friends.

#15 Harleenz

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 01:40 PM

In my household it was a half/half public/homeschool thing.

I went to (semi-decent Florida) public schools my entire life and I enjoyed it! I was pretty nerdy and an academically inclined kid, and I was never picked on or a loner or anything. All the "cool kids" just seemed indifferent to me or just nice to me. My senior year, the school let me do one of those dual-enrollment programs (Go to college and high school at the same time) and the school also took me to the hospital 3x a week to job shadow/intern around! They gave me really nice opportunities I didn't think I'd get.

After school though, my mom would reteach us everything we learned for the day and made us read chapters we haven't covered in school yet. She would buy us workbooks over the summer to learn stuff in advanced. I remember all the times I'd come home with a 98 on a test and telling my mom I got the highest grade in the class. She'd tell me that its nothing special cause my classmates where dummies and that I didn't get a 100%. Oy lol.


I admit, public education isn't the best but, if you instill some good values into your kid (That education is important and that it is the key to be successful in life, etc), everything will fall into place. A poor learning system won't stop your kid's determination and thirst for knowledge. And you'll have money to spend on something else.


And yes. I probably lost all credibility once I mentioned that I am the spawn from the FL education system. :p

Edited by Harleenz, 08 February 2012 - 01:43 PM.


#16 luvsmyncis

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 03:27 PM

I was homeschooled. Best 3 years of my fuckin' life. I wish I could work from home. I'm best left to my own devices, and my mother recognized that.
But it isn't for everyone. I think it's important for a child to go to school, for at least some of their life so they can see what kinds of bullshit there is in store for them in life. In school you learn about unfairness, favoritism, bullying, fleeting crushes. It's the best way to discover that group projects suck, and if you draw a picture of a cartoon dead cat in the 3rd grade classroom writing book with a rhyming poem you wrote called "Flat the Cat", you will be sent to the counselors office twice a week for the rest of your elementary years for being mentally disturbed instead of being praised for being creative. 

#17 NapisaurusRex

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 06:47 PM

From kindergarten to Jr high, I went to a bunch of different teeny-tiny schools in rural mid-America. I was taught things like 'we (the South) should have won the War Between the States!' and somehow totally missed learning about multiplication and cursive writing. For Jr high and high school, I went to a much, much larger school on the edge of a big city. There was a lot of gang activity and stuff there. At the time, I would have given anything to be home-schooled and ended up spending a lot of time wandering around doing nothing. I was bored with the little they did try to teach. The teachers spent more time trying to control the classes instead of teaching and I was learning more by not being there, simply because there was a public library down the road and it was as safe a place to be as any.

Now, I'm back in a little town with my 3-year-old, and I'm trying to find ways to home-school or get her in a private school.

#18 TamerVirus

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 07:07 PM

I can only speak from personal experience here. I am a product of a catholic elementary school and one of the best private high schools in the United States.

Now there are distinct advantages and disadvantages to attending a private institution. At a private institution, classes are considerably smaller, meaning an increased teacher-student relationship. The curriculum is alot more focused: the increased amount and difficulty of the workload will more than prepare one for college. Speaking on college, guidance councilors at private institutions are "in the know", meaning they have increased pull among top tier colleges. Because private schools attract a higher caliber of clientele, opportunities are everywhere: internships and such are pasted all over the walls.

Now for the cons. One cannot simply walk into private school. Competition is FIERCE, depending on when one is planning to enroll. (My school is K-12, acceptance rate into Kindergarten alone is lower than that of Harvard University) Its not cheap either. Expect to cough up the dough every year. Also the overspecialized curriculum detracts from other aspects. My school is geared towards a liberal arts education, resulting in a top notch English, foreign language, and Latin curriculum. However, the math and science department is not as great. Also, don't expect educational diversity as public institutions. While public schools might have a dozen or so AP classes and many electives, private school? not as much.

I hope I could have been of some help

#19 Maeghan

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 08:12 PM

I thank everyone for their words of advice.
And no, I'm not a religious psycho. I'm actually ambivalent to the whole situation of religion.
I just don't want my daughter coming home from school rapping to eminem or pit bull at 7 years old, kwim?

Many of your posts have made me want to continue with the idea of homeschooling. Sadly, private school is simply out of our budget and I've never heard of a k-12 school that wasn't very religious. We live close to one of the largest private schools in Texas, but it's southern baptist. So no thanks.

As far as Sweeney goes, I might not be trained to teach, but I know my daughter better than anyone else. I know how she learns, when she learns best, what interests her the most. I can make a learning program completely focused on her skills and interests, while proposing the less fun stuff in interesting and unique ways. It's hard for any teacher to do that for each child when he/she is teaching a class of 30.

Btw. My dads a teacher. He's an idiot. If he can do it, so can I. Lol.

#20 Bone

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 08:16 PM

Perhaps the most important question of all: are you employed? Homeschooling (well) and having a job are all but mutually exclusive.

#21 Maeghan

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 08:17 PM

Currently yes,
However by the time the chunksters in kindergarten we foresee the ability for me to stay home.

#22 NapisaurusRex

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 08:23 PM

Perhaps the most important question of all: are you employed? Homeschooling (well) and having a job are all but mutually exclusive.


I disagree. I believe you can have a job and homeschool or alternatively school well. It's just about prioritizing and having good time management skills. I think what I'm doing now would be considered less homeschool and more of alternative method. Basically, I pay a stay at home mom with Montessori training and a degree in early child development to play with my kid. It's only a little more expensive than a normal daycare, plus my daughter gets attention she wouldn't get in a normal daycare. The woman who watches her has one other kid that stays at home with her. They do a half-day of learning and half of playing. When I pick her up after work, we make food and eat together, then do some kind of activity. Education comes in many, many forms. On weekends, we do the same half-day of learning, half of free time for her (aka homework for me) and then she goes to sleep and I do whatever I didn't do during the week. She helps me with almost all the chores: dishwashing, laundry, vacuuming, etc. This leaves more time for us to be together/learn together.

#23 TamerVirus

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Posted 08 February 2012 - 08:23 PM

Hey. You gotta make due with what you have available. But if your going to home school, don't keep her separated from the outside world. In today's society, good social skills are just as important as a good work ethic and academic bearing. That being said, you might want to let your child explore a school or high school sometime down the line. Also, it might be a good idea to start looking for extracurriculars, such as sports, music or theater, of which availability is lower for homeschooled kids

#24 Sweeney

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Posted 09 February 2012 - 12:43 AM

As far as Sweeney goes, I might not be trained to teach, but I know my daughter better than anyone else. I know how she learns, when she learns best, what interests her the most. I can make a learning program completely focused on her skills and interests, while proposing the less fun stuff in interesting and unique ways. It's hard for any teacher to do that for each child when he/she is teaching a class of 30.

Btw. My dads a teacher. He's an idiot. If he can do it, so can I. Lol.

Sure you do, but only because no one with any any ability with children has apparently been anywhere near her.
Are you trained in phonic knowledge like a teacher? Are you trained in spotting and correcting misconceptions in numeracy and science? Are you capable of educating your daughter in the practises of cultures you're not familiar with? Do you, even, know the standard that she should be at before entering middle school?
A program of learning shouldn't focus entirely on a child's existing skills and interests. How then would you expect them to develop the ability to succeed in things that don't interest them, like she will have to do in regular schooling? Going to come up with a "fun and interesting" way to teach her letter sounds every single day?
The likelihood is that you'll bring up a spoiled, priveleged child who will find it harder to cope in middle school, and therefore choose to stay at home with Mommy, where you will be sorely ill-equipped to deal with her learning needs.

#25 Maeghan

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Posted 09 February 2012 - 04:14 AM

My mil, whos degree is in English and early childhood development, is around my daughter.
Her sister also has a degree in early childhood education with a focus on special education. She home schools her 14 year old son who has down syndrome. I won't exactly be doing this on my own.

While I agree, it will be difficult to teach high level of science subjects, something im weak in, it isn't out of the realm of possibility for me to hire a tutor or explore public school options when she reaches that level.

To assume that she will be a spoiled brat because I chose to homeschool her is kind of ignorant of you.


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