This took forever, but I wanted to get context. It could be that I just misinterpreted this whole thread.
Do you lean more towards asking them nicely or some other alternative?
I lean towards using the most effective strategy for the individual child that doesn't involve abusive behaviour.
If none of those other strategies work?
At what point does alternative punishment become a physical punishment though? You can only be awake to get a good talking to for so long before the child has been awake an unnatural amount of time.
Uh, "a good talking to" isn't really a very good option either. Don't you have two children?
I was interpreting a 'good talking to' as the pre/post time out time.
And the reason for that should be clear from those posts.
Just for clarity's sake, I think he's saying this because every kid and every scenario is different. He can't give you a replace-spanking-with-this because it's so subjective.
It's pretty simple. If it causes your child physical pain or discomfort, don't do it.
I can't think of a good way to word what I want to say here, but what if time out causes the child discomfort?
Where?
See above.
We probably should have mentioned somewhere that we employ many other steps and alternatives before reaching results such as spanking. It's really not like one of them shoves the other out of the way and we drag them off to spank them.
Our normal methods are as follows:
Reminder about proper behavior > Reminder about what will happen if misbehavior continues > time-out > sent to bed > OTHER punishment (Spanking, washing mouth out with soap, etc.)
It takes an awful lot for the situation to digress to the point of the OTHER punishment. Some other things that happens are that they get grounded from the t.v./xbox. They don't actually play on the xbox but losing the t.v. privileges has proven to be a dissuading factor.
We have a ton of discussion regarding appropriate behavior, being good examples for their sisters, reminding them that the bad behavior their sister just did will get them in trouble if they do it as well, and so on... I mean we talk about it so much I don't know why they can't quote it like scripture at this point.
This is kinda what I want to talk to you tonight... but a little more privately? (And also, why?)
Edited by Napiform, 20 May 2013 - 06:18 PM.