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Hookup culture 2.0

totm fikrieatyourheart codexslutgate2k16

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#51 Nonexistent

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 04:07 PM

July 23 Ryan and I will have been together for 4 years! We want to be married but for my financial aid, we can't so I can keep getting loans and scholarships based on my own tax information and not his. He makes too much but surely not enough to pay for my school.

Sounds like you have everything figured out, and should be smooth sailing once you finish school

#52 Swim

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 05:19 PM

blah 

i mean like a have a girl so i dont go hu with every other girl

but like when im single

i kinda like to explore options



#53 ortin

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 07:14 PM

Monogamous for me. I just think that sex should be something more significant than doing it with random people or in a FWB style. Don't care much about what other people do if they're responsible.

#54 UnicornSoul

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 07:28 PM

Sounds like you have everything figured out, and should be smooth sailing once you finish school

As long as the world wills it, everything will be smooth sailing! I try to stay positive and generate good karma! I help people, I keep my thoughts to myself. I speak positiveness and just try to take everything day by day and not worry or stress. All in the hopes that the world will reward me with what I want and see in my dreams. Hahahaha I sound like I am on acid right now, but that's literally how I live my life. My man and I work well together, have the same goals in life, and are on the same page with all the important stuff like marriage, family, vacations and retirement!


From 2006 - 2012 before I moved to TN, my life was not smooth sailing at all. I tell the stories in my blog when the memory comes up while typing, so I won't go into detail on here. But life was totally not awesome for me during those years! But I kept my head up and kept kicking my way through!


Edited by ChaoticBeauty, 10 June 2016 - 07:28 PM.


#55 Jess

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 08:07 PM

Monogamous for me. I just think that sex should be something more significant than doing it with random people or in a FWB style. Don't care much about what other people do if they're responsible.

ehhh responsibility is subjective.

#56 Romy

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 08:12 PM

ehhh responsibility is subjective.

I always put a helmet on before going on a bike ride.



#57 Jess

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 08:13 PM

I always put a helmet on before going on a bike ride.

dude i can't even ride a bike



#58 UnicornSoul

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 08:13 PM

I always put a helmet on before going on a bike ride.

I always use my blinker when changing lanes!



#59 ortin

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 08:18 PM

ehhh responsibility is subjective.

So? Almost all aspects of human society is entirely subjective.

#60 Jess

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 08:23 PM

So? Almost all aspects of human society is entirely subjective.

The issue occurs when you start caring as soon as someone doesn't fit your view of responsible.

I'm super sensitive about the current views of responsibility and reproduction right now.

#61 Faeling

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Posted 10 June 2016 - 11:17 PM

Nah, he's absolutely ace. 10 years together and I still think he's the absolute best thing on the planet. Eyes still brighten when I see him, and I feel the tension of a room change when he walks in. Can't imagine ever being that into someone else.

I'm the same exact way with my Hubs! Met him when I was 17, married at 21, been together for 15 years and I couldn't imagine my life without him!! 

 

When I was single my mom and friends had driven so much of the fear of STDs into me I couldn't fathom a hook up, sooooo yah

 

eh this thread makes me feel old LOL oh well

 

and @Ali and @Coops really wanna rep but ran out, I applaud both the loving great relationships ya'll found when ya'll needed them, much like I did. 


Edited by Faeling, 10 June 2016 - 11:25 PM.


#62 Dont

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 05:39 AM

If anyone says anything remotely close enough to take it as them shaming guys I'm going to go hard as fuck.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Otherwise, the relationship type. Happily engaged to get married.

When I was younger I hooked up more but I realized that when you get intimate with people on that level, even sometimes when you think it's a light breezy thing, it's not. I realize I was subtly hurting people, giving them experiences they won't truly enjoy remembering (regardless of how good it was, good or bad idk).

 

That being said some of the people I'm sure didn't care then and don't care now about hooking up, but I know some felt otherwise so naturally I stopped wanting to hook up.


dude i can't even ride a bike

 

 

for real? try it out you'll get it



#63 Jess

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 06:09 AM

Ok, I thought of my answer. It took me a while.
I've done monogamous and was a mistress a while a billion years ago. I go back and forth between wanting monogamy forever and not wanting any kind of commitment at all. Flirting is just part of my nature and comes naturally, but that's something I struggled with a lot over the past few years, between suppressing it for my ex and being unable to find the line between flirting and being nice (there isn't one for me.)

 

Whenever my current BF talks about marriage or getting old together or even like 5 year plans, he stops every time and tells me not to "make that face" that is apparently a combination of horror and panic and is totally involuntary. It's not him, I thoroughly enjoy him, but I'm just at a stage in my life where commitment to anything that's not inanimate or under the age of 10 makes me cringe.
 

for real? try it out you'll get it

Nah, I'm too old now.



#64 sprockets

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 07:12 AM

Nah, I'm too old now.


Never too old, I only learned how to ride a bike 3 years ago because I was forced to.

#65 Katya

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 07:57 AM

I'm a monogamous cougar slut.

 

Before Mancave I've never had a serious relationship. I'd never found found someone who was able to satisfy me in all levels (surprisingly, more intellectually than physically) or understand some things about me or the job(s) I had, therefore I never cared about the men I was with in a more profound way. To this day, I'm still not sure if I'm the relationship type of person, even though I've been in a relationship for almost a decade.

We've had our on and off moments, all of them in a pre Tiny Humans era, but we've never been apart more than 5-6 months in a row. During our breakups and before I met him, I used to dance the hookups tango a few times, not too many because I found the men I hooked-up with where too clingy for a one night thing or a sporadic booty call in the middle of the week. I was like "why do you want to know my name, if it's just sex?". Blergh. No. Get away from me.

But even then I would never be with two guys at the same time. Too much work and the type of drama I don't care about, and it's not really my thing.

 

 

 

Whenever my current BF talks about marriage or getting old together or even like 5 year plans, he stops every time and tells me not to "make that face" that is apparently a combination of horror and panic and is totally involuntary. It's not him, I thoroughly enjoy him, but I'm just at a stage in my life where commitment to anything that's not inanimate or under the age of 10 makes me cringe.

 

That sounds familiar. Even today, after all these years, I still enter in "fight-or-flight" mode whenever Mancave starts doing plans for our future or when he tries to make me talk about my feelings and he always says that "don't make that face" lmao.

I used to be a lot worse, before Tiny Humans every time he talked to me about our relationship (that word alone was enough to make me walk out the door) or our plans for our future I disappeared for weeks. I still have a backup plan -that he discovered part of it a few months ago lol- because I still think one day I'll screw this so bad the only thing I can do is run, which happens more frequently than I admit.



#66 Tammy

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 08:27 AM

dude i can't even ride a bike

 

I can't ride a bike either! There aren't a lot of us haha



#67 Nanarie

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 08:33 AM

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 7 years, with maybe a 6 month or so breakup during my first year of college. During that time, I had fun slutting around. No sex but a lot of hookups with total randos. Definitely got a lot more liberal in college. fuck yeah. It was fun, sometimes I miss it and wonder if it's the right choice not to date different people. I'm still young so I wonder if this is the relationship for me, but I think it's normal to have doubts so I'll just see where it goes. I also struggle with the "fight or flight response" but I figure it's a case of "the grass is always greener on the other side" and I need to calm the fuck down. 



#68 ninjaweeb

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 08:34 AM

Hmm, okay! Time to finally weigh in. Before this relationship, I honestly was scared of commitment. Every time I snagged a seemingly perfect guy. I would find a way to pick him apart and make him 'undateable.' However, my first date with current SO I remember looking over at him while he was driving me home and thinking 'fuck, this is the one I am going to marry.'

On hookups.. somehow even though I was terrified of commitment and would look for a way out, I would always get way too attached to hookups and ruin it by drunken emotional crying lol. Idk daddy issues~ Also.. I don't know why I even liked to hookup or find guys because I have never even had the big O, or really enjoyed sex lol. (Still in the same boat. Only like sex because I like seeing my SO happy and reducing him into a puddle of mush)
 

 

I can't ride a bike either! There aren't a lot of us haha

Jesus christ, what is it with us Codex girls? I can't either, literally tried last summer and with my first full pedal turn I ran into the garage and hurt myself lmao



#69 Ladida

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 08:58 AM

Hmm, okay! Time to finally weigh in. Before this relationship, I honestly was scared of commitment. Every time I snagged a seemingly perfect guy. I would find a way to pick him apart and make him 'undateable.' However, my first date with current SO I remember looking over at him while he was driving me home and thinking 'fuck, this is the one I am going to marry.'

On hookups.. somehow even though I was terrified of commitment and would look for a way out, I would always get way too attached to hookups and ruin it by drunken emotional crying lol. Idk daddy issues~ Also.. I don't know why I even liked to hookup or find guys because I have never even had the big O, or really enjoyed sex lol. (Still in the same boat. Only like sex because I like seeing my SO happy and reducing him into a puddle of mush)
 

 

Jesus christ, what is it with us Codex girls? I can't either, literally tried last summer and with my first full pedal turn I ran into the garage and hurt myself lmao

This is definitely me. I'm so terrified of commitment that I am pretty sure I pick dead end/long distance relationships on purpose. I already have a Hell of a time trusting someone I'm in a relationship with, so hook ups aren't even an option for me.

 

I can ride a bike though :p


Edited by Ladida, 11 June 2016 - 09:04 AM.


#70 UnicornSoul

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 09:03 AM

I can ride a bike with no hands and standing up (not pedal though) with no hands. I just get some speed going, stand up, let go of the handle bars and steer the bike with my weight and body shifting. But that's all I can do.



#71 Kitty

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 09:25 AM

Monogamous for me. I just think that sex should be something more significant than doing it with random people or in a FWB style. Don't care much about what other people do if they're responsible.

I'm glad i'm not the only one D:



#72 Jess

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 09:31 AM

This is definitely me. I'm so terrified of commitment that I am pretty sure I pick dead end/long distance relationships on purpose. I already have a Hell of a time trusting someone I'm in a relationship with, so hook ups aren't even an option for me.

So i'm pretty sure you just made me realize something about myself, that I'm purposefully picking out ldr's on purpose now. My bf travels for work and I see him once a week to once a month depending on where he's working.



#73 Adam

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 09:43 AM

So i'm pretty sure you just made me realize something about myself, that I'm purposefully picking out ldr's on purpose now. My bf travels for work and I see him once a week to once a month depending on where he's working.

What does LDR mean?

 

Never mind I'm dumb. 



#74 Jess

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 09:45 AM

What does LDR mean?

 

Never mind I'm dumb. 

Long distance relationship if anyone doesn't know.



#75 Nanarie

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Posted 11 June 2016 - 10:05 AM

So i'm pretty sure you just made me realize something about myself, that I'm purposefully picking out ldr's on purpose now. My bf travels for work and I see him once a week to once a month depending on where he's working.


I'm in an LDR and its nice to have the independence. But wouldn't it be worse than a regular relationship if you already have trust issues?



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