16 replies to this topic

[Alex]

It started off as a typical morning. Then my mom told me my grandpa has passed away. My trip to visit them is only a couple months away. I really had a lot to ask him, I wanted to do so many things. It's kind of unfair but I'm not angry. When my mom told me I went into shock, it felt like an eternity before I realized which grandpa, and another eternity before i realizedwhat really happened. At first I thought it was a cruel joke honestly, there was a "no way" moment.
I dont even remember what the last thing I said to him was.

Im not sure what to do now.

Edited by Alex, 27 April 2008 - 12:39 PM.

[Fox]

I can't say much but to offer my condolences -
I'm sure I can speak for everyone here when I say that we're here to listen (or read, rather) if you want.

[hab]

I know what you feel, I cried like a baby when my grandpa passed away 3 years ago and I hadn't seen him much before he died... You just have to stay strong, that's all I can tell you.. It was his time, you can't do anything about it...

[illicit]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can relate totally. My uncle passed away just a couple of months ago. We were really close. He was totally healthy, then he falls into a coma one day and the next he's gone. It's unreal. Again, I'm terribly sorry.

[Black Flame]

I'm so sorry Alex All I can really say is to not bottle up your feelings. Both my grandfathers and one of my grandmothers died before I was born, so I only have one grandparent.

Stay strong. Obviously it will be quite hard at first, but it'll pass with time.

[Selphie]

I'm so sorry to read about your loss. It's horrible when somebody passes away, and it takes a long time to put things into perspective and feel more at ease with things again. It isn't much but I'm quite sure that everybody here at Codex can understand how you're feeling and I personally know exactly what you're experiencing. I'm thinking of you.

[redlion]

It happens. I know that could be called insensitive, but it does. I hope you come to accept it, because it'll make you feel better. Don't get too down.

[Aetas]

Along with my condolences (I have had a grandparent pass away with me wanting to know much, much more- my family got to know her very well, but I was but a baby when they did this. I only met her twice.), I give a piece of advice- Before someone else is gone, make the most of your time

with them. Never be angry with someone when they leave or go to sleep, and always remind your loved one that they are, in fact, loved. =)

[Hydrogen]

Sorry to hear that man . Death is a sad reality of life. Hopefully it will be easy on you though . I kind of felt the same way when my Grandma left this world. I still feel like I lost out on a lot of wisdom... I never got the chance to learn from her properly. But one may only be able to understand these things in retrospect...

[Christopher Robin]

It started off as a typical morning. Then my mom told me my grandpa has passed away. My trip to visit them is only a couple months away. I really had a lot to ask him, I wanted to do so many things. It's kind of unfair but I'm not angry. When my mom told me I went into shock, it felt like an eternity before I realized which grandpa, and another eternity before i realizedwhat really happened. At first I thought it was a cruel joke honestly, there was a "no way" moment.
I dont even remember what the last thing I said to him was.

Im not sure what to do now.

Dude, there's nothing you can do. It isn't your fault that you never asked those questions, you never did anything wrong. Clearly, you loved him, and that's all you can do. Might not seem like much, but to him, I'll bet you meant the world. That's how it was with MY pop, his grandchildren meant the world. There's nothing you can do, man... life is a fucking dirty business, but it'll go on. Fuck the world, dude. It's all a big waste of time anyways, the only thing you're put here to do, is enjoy yourself. Remember the good times and stuff... hopefully, you'll come to understand that it's fine, like... Mourning it for a long time, bottling it all up, or even getting angry, is all going to do nothing... I mean... it's best to get out your tears while they're fresh. Family and stuff, is the best thing to have around you. The funeral, the wake, the big family gathering before a funeral, is all the best time to cry, or talk, or anything like that. You'll be ok. Just roll with it, there's nothing better you can do. It'll all work out anyways. I got MY pop's hat yesterday, cause I always used to like it.

Dude. You made me cry. Bastard.


Don't waste time regretting what you'd have LIKED to do, spend your time better, by learning to cope with it. He's probably better off anyways, definitely is, if he was sick... Else, it's good that he WASN'T sick for his last while. Take comfort in that he's not gonna suffer or anything, and that he's alright now, he's not in any pain or anything.

Just roll with it, and you'll be ok. Don't try to appear strong or anything by not crying, it'll only give you a headache, and make you angry. Cry all you can... it relieves stress, and stuff that's good, you know?

Peace. Feel better.

[pyke]

Sometimes I wonder if I was lucky in the sense that I never really had an opportunity to really get to know my grandfathers. I would have really liked to have gotten to know my grandfather on my dads side, but I guess I never had to feel too sad when he passed away . Both had passesd away before I was 5 years old. Insanely though, I still have a great grand father living who's 93 years old now and still as smart as he always was

Anyways, I can't really offer much advice, as I was too young to really be impacted with either of my grandfathers. All I can say is I hope that you're not down about it too long. Reflect on the good times and don't beat yourself up over what you could have asked.

[Alex]

Thanks guys. It's such a weird feeling knowing you'll never be able to talk to someone again. This is the first time someone close to me has died.

[Jewbert]

I would give you a big hug if I could. . . I know EXACTLY how you feel.

I made a post elsewhere on here about what happened to my Pawpaw. You may have read it or not.
Either way, him passing away was the worst for me because I was -so- close to him. I was like a little tomboy
when I was younger, and always stayed with him. He spoiled me rotten, too!

Today made 10 years since my dad passed away. I went to his grave, in the rain, and put some pretty flowers on
his grave. I hadn't been up there to it in forever which makes me feel really shitty. But it's so bad because I never
got a chance to -really- know my dad. My parents were divorced and he did off shore and overseas work so I almost
never got to see him. Really hurts that I'll never get to talk to him again or see him again. Time heals, but I always
have weak moments where I just sit down and cry.

I hope things get better for you. Just hang in there and don't be afraid to cry.

[Kisarou]

My grandpa left me when I was still young. I remember that I cried so much that my parents have to hug me and do all sorts of things just to make me stop crying.

Yes, time makes you feel better gradually over time. Humans have to leave this world sooner or later, its just a matter of time

Try not to think too much about it (:

[Christopher Robin]

Thanks guys. It's such a weird feeling knowing you'll never be able to talk to someone again. This is the first time someone close to me has died.

I know what you mean, the not being able to talk to him again...

It's like... He knew how to do EVERYTHING, like... My pop built me a boat once, and I still have it... a little flat (style of boat), for trolling in lakes and stuff... I'll miss him forever. Just try to let it go, he wouldn't want you to be sad. Just think of it as, he completed everything he's supposed to in life. And at least it wasn't some long, drawn out suffering death like cancer or something...

Feel better dude. <3

Not gay if balls don't touch.

[BinaryAttack]

my condolences alex. Felt the same when my grandma passed away.

[Grizzly]

I can relate, bro. I felt similarly when I heard my grandmother passed away last summer.
All my family lives in Korea so I had never really got to know most of them. I did see my grandmother one summer when she came to America and we always spoke on the phone after that. She always told me how she missed me and wanted to see me again this coming summer, but it never happened.
When I heard the news, I was dumbfounded. I kind of just stared blankly for what felt like hours.. I was too shocked for tears.

I guess everyone goes through something like this in their life time. My condolences.