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QUICK:Easiest Sickness to Fake


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#1 Vegas

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 01:03 PM

I did an all nighter for my chem midterm and an hour and a half before the test, which was fucking at 8 in the fucking morning, I fell asleep. Woke up like 8:30. Was able to get a doctors appointment with this really chill walk-in clinic guy. I talked to some older students and they said just fake a stomach flu or some shit.

Any kind of better sicknessess to fake. Like shit thats hard to physically prove(unlike a sore throat or ear infection or something)

I know you can say its not fair or whatever but fuck, I was so hella tired from my spring break trip and I actually did try to study.

#2 Lawivido

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 01:12 PM

Diarrhea, bouts of nausea, and continuously blowing kisses to the china goddess.

Edited by DizzleMagicLocknessMonster, 23 February 2009 - 01:14 PM.


#3 Sweeney

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 01:27 PM

I said I was vomiting all night and slept through my alarm when it happened to me tongue.gif

Genetics exam too, would have aced it x_X

#4 Cory

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 03:06 PM

Crabs, tell the doctor you have crabs.

#5 Amour

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 04:18 PM

24 hour stomach virus is always the best.

#6 Tetiel

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 05:14 PM

If you really want to fake illness, you need to be able to risk the pain. Buy some Fleet (should be able to find it in the laxative section of your local pharmacy. Rexall should have it?) and follow the directions. It should say something like drink 45 ml with a full glass of water. It'll taste HORRIBLE like seawater but you gotta down it all. Make sure to drink something that'll take the taste out because you will want to vomit.

Basically, this stuff is meant for you to clean yourself out for a colonoscopy. That's how effective it is. It'll make you pee out your anus the diarrhea will be so bad but NO ONE will accuse you of faking it. Just make sure to drink a shitload of fluids because you'll lose a lot in the process.

#7 Vegas

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 05:51 PM

QUOTE (Tetiel @ Feb 23 2009, 08:14 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
If you really want to fake illness, you need to be able to risk the pain. Buy some Fleet (should be able to find it in the laxative section of your local pharmacy. Rexall should have it?) and follow the directions. It should say something like drink 45 ml with a full glass of water. It'll taste HORRIBLE like seawater but you gotta down it all. Make sure to drink something that'll take the taste out because you will want to vomit.

Basically, this stuff is meant for you to clean yourself out for a colonoscopy. That's how effective it is. It'll make you pee out your anus the diarrhea will be so bad but NO ONE will accuse you of faking it. Just make sure to drink a shitload of fluids because you'll lose a lot in the process.

lol fuck I think I'll use the stomach excuse.

ughh thing too right now is for some reason I FEEL LEGITLY SICK. throat feels like shit and got a headache. had to reschedule appointment till tomoro.

#8 Tetiel

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 06:03 PM

QUOTE (Vegas @ Feb 23 2009, 08:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
lol fuck I think I'll use the stomach excuse.

ughh thing too right now is for some reason I FEEL LEGITLY SICK. throat feels like shit and got a headache. had to reschedule appointment till tomoro.

Lack of sleep and the fact that OH MY GOD IT WAS SO FUCKING COLD TODAY IN TORONTO makes your immune system susceptible to illness.

Oh and thought you would. Buuuuuut if you're ever in a true bind and really don't want to go to school...

#9 Vegas

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 06:33 PM

QUOTE (Tetiel @ Feb 23 2009, 09:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Lack of sleep and the fact that OH MY GOD IT WAS SO FUCKING COLD TODAY IN TORONTO makes your immune system susceptible to illness.

Oh and thought you would. Buuuuuut if you're ever in a true bind and really don't want to go to school...

fuck I thought this stupid weather shit was done. its always warm up to like a couple degrees above zero, then fucking drop to like -10 in a period of a week. +fucking wind.

#10 The Dirty Filipino

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 08:56 PM

QUOTE (Vegas @ Feb 23 2009, 07:33 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
fuck I thought this stupid weather shit was done. its always warm up to like a couple degrees above zero, then fucking drop to like -10 in a period of a week. +fucking wind.


Say you went to Mexico and bought a hooker. You woke up the morning of the exam and thought you had an STD. Turns out it was just a Jalapeno seed stuck up in thurr.

Edited by The Dirty Filipino, 23 February 2009 - 09:19 PM.


#11 Tetiel

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 09:05 PM

QUOTE (The Dirty Filipino @ Feb 23 2009, 11:56 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Say you went to Mexico and bout a hooker. You woke up the morning of the exam and thought you had an STD. Turns out it was just a Jalapeno seed stuck up in thurr.

*chortles* nice. nice.

#12 The Dirty Filipino

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Posted 23 February 2009 - 09:20 PM

QUOTE (Tetiel @ Feb 23 2009, 10:05 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
*chortles* nice. nice.

I'm a little faded and realized I spelled 'bought' wrong. You should edit it in your quotation so it doesn't look like I can't spell wink.gif

#13 XenoCyde

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Posted 25 February 2009 - 09:59 AM

Most likely the common cold?

#14 nox

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Posted 25 February 2009 - 11:57 AM

QUOTE (Tetiel @ Feb 23 2009, 08:14 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
If you really want to fake illness, you need to be able to risk the pain. Buy some Fleet (should be able to find it in the laxative section of your local pharmacy. Rexall should have it?) and follow the directions. It should say something like drink 45 ml with a full glass of water. It'll taste HORRIBLE like seawater but you gotta down it all. Make sure to drink something that'll take the taste out because you will want to vomit.

Basically, this stuff is meant for you to clean yourself out for a colonoscopy. That's how effective it is. It'll make you pee out your anus the diarrhea will be so bad but NO ONE will accuse you of faking it. Just make sure to drink a shitload of fluids because you'll lose a lot in the process.

DONT DO THIS!!! you will have an awful night...trust me that shit is terrible. just fake a stomach virus

#15 Vegas

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Posted 25 February 2009 - 12:16 PM

I faked a stomach flu and told him it developed into a fever, which I think I legitly had and was able to get a note. He kinda chuckled a bit here and there though. He asked if I had diarrhea and I told him no and I found out later on google that diarrhea is almost always a symptom stomach flu.

#16 Mr. Hobo

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Posted 25 February 2009 - 01:03 PM

Next time say you accidentally a bottle of coke and see what happens

#17 Tetiel

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Posted 25 February 2009 - 01:42 PM

QUOTE (nox @ Feb 25 2009, 02:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
DONT DO THIS!!! you will have an awful night...trust me that shit is terrible. just fake a stomach virus

Believe me, I already know smile.gif However it's hard to convince if you have no symptoms

#18 Lawivido

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Posted 25 February 2009 - 03:37 PM

QUOTE (Vegas @ Feb 25 2009, 12:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I faked a stomach flu and told him it developed into a fever, which I think I legitly had and was able to get a note. He kinda chuckled a bit here and there though. He asked if I had diarrhea and I told him no and I found out later on google that diarrhea is almost always a symptom stomach flu.

Had the stomach flu last week. Diarrhea + vomit = nobueno.


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