Wombat

Just want to chime in now with my thanks for this. 

A glass of wine, preferably outside. Zoning out with headphones on and avoiding human contact for a bit. 

Some people use sodium bicarbonate as shampoo and apple vinegar as conditioner, but I can't say if this works.

That seems like it would be harder on your hair than regular shampoo

I had iPhones, switched to a Moto X with Android, and absolutely hated it. I returned to the iPhone and never looked back