13 replies to this topic

[Rhiann]

Well.
I kind of need some advice of some sorts.
My mom walked in on me about 30 minutes ago, I was crying like crazy.
She pushed me into telling her what was wrong, and well, this is basically what:

I love my fiance.
But I don't know if I'm madly in love with him.
My mom says that comes right away with love, but I didn't even really love him till the 3rd time we saw each other.
(Long distance relationship).
We jumped into sex too fast, and I don't know if that's caused me to love him or not.
I kind of wish we waited, but I guess shit happens.

I just want some advice from people who have been/are in relationships.

Is it too late to be madly in love?
What is your opinion of being madly in love?

Please don't reply with something stupid x__x
This issue is slightly sensitive.

[travis]

SMH! Its NEVER too late to be in love!
Some people fall in love within the first 2 dates...some people it takes months! There's no proper "time" to be in love...or "madly" in love. It just happens as it does. C'est la vie!

[Sida]

Why would it be too late? If anything it's too early. When you love him enough you'll know you want to marry him. It's not gonna happen overnight lol give it chance

[Rhiann]

I guess I just know people who fall madly in love right away, so I kind of wonder if something's wrong. Haha.
Maybe I'm worrying over nothing.
:3

[pyke]

Definitely give it a bit of time and see what happens.

[Sweeney]

Falling in love instantly is an utter myth. You can fall in lust instantly, develop an infatuation of a crush instantly, but love comes later.
You can only love someone when you've gotten past their annoying little habits, when you know the inside of them.

It appears your Mom is a fool.

[Sida]

When did being in love stop being enough for people?!

When the size of diamond rings got bigger -.-

[Rhiann]

When the size of diamond rings got bigger -.-

Rofl xD
Mine's only like a 1/4 carat.
It's still too big imo.

Hm, but it's nice to see feedback like this.
I guess I just compare my own relationship to too many other peoples' relationships, thinking I want what they have.
But they have totally different personalities than my fiance and I.
Some people I know are madly in love, and I wonder why I'm not like that with my fiance.
I mean, I know it's good to have them as the top person on your mind, but I have friends that are almost just as high up.

Ehm, I guess most of what I've been feeling lately is brought on by jealousy.
He keeps telling me it's a natural human feeling, but it still makes me feel like crap.
Especially since it's the holiday season, and we still havn't spent one together

We pretty much talked it out last night, so I think we're okay.
And yes, I think my mother is a fool sometimes too.
It's not like she knows what it's like to be in a long distance relationship.
It's not that easy to fall in love with words on a computer screen. Lols.

[Tetiel]

In my last relationship I discovered I wasn't happy after being with him for four years. It took me being away from him again to really wake up and understand why I was so depressed when I was at school and why I was happier at home. I loved him and I cared about him deeply, but the love I felt almost was like I was forcing myself to do so because of my personal beliefs. In other words to have a cliche, I loved him, but was not in love with him. And that can happen to anyone. Really, it can.

Long distance relationships can be rough especially as so many people aren't exactly what they say they are on the internet. I'm not talking about the type that secretly are 40 and want to rape you. I'm talking about people who stage their experiences and personalities like so many do online to hide from who they really are. They can sometimes not be the same person you fell in love with or had a friendship with. I suggest you think on everything in the relationship and determine what is driving you to be with him and if what you feel is right. Reflect on your feelings and why you think they're there.

[Rhiann]

Well, I guess I could mention that I've seen my fiance like 8 times and I finished staying where he was for 3 months about a month ago.
I really do feel different when I'm with him compared to talking to him over the internet.
I'm always so depressed when I have to hear his voice over a microphone instead of right in front of my face.

The only thing stopping us from being together is the fact that we live in different countries, and he's getting his background check done for his citizenship as well.
Hopefully that wont take too long.

I guess if I didn't love him, I wouldn't wait this long for him to get this done.
Darn governments. lols.

[pyke]

when you know the inside of them.

Just sayin.

[Rhiann]

Lol? xD

[Ives]

Love takes time, you don't have to jump the gun if you feel time is going too quick.