awesome. haven't been there in forever.
i sit down, and take a massive bite of their pot roast, and suddenly, realize: i've taken too big of a bite.
well, the chunk wouldn't go down. and strangely enough, it wasn't lodge in a way to stop my breathing, but it *completely* stopped me from being able to swallow. i literally had it "stuck in my throat"
so i do the most logical thing, drink some water, maybe i can wash it down?
no. the water hits it, and shoot back up, suddenly i find myself running to the bathroom to spew out this phlegmy water.
so i then do the second most logical thing: gag myself.
so i lock myself in a stall and begin shoving my finger down my throat. spit. dry heave. phlegm. rinse. repeat.
i'm in the bathroom for about 15-20 min before i realize this isn't going to work.
keep in mind, i can still breathe fine, i just can't swallow, and my throat is beginning to get *really* sore by now.
i go outside and grab a buddy "hey, i need the heimlich"
he comes inside and begins to bear hug the shit out of me, causing my chest to bruise, and the food to remain. this isn't working, and i've had this shit in my throat for almost 30 min now. we gotta seek professional help.
he races me to the ER, with me dry heaving every quarter mile.
we get there, i'm still heaving, and the doctors and nurses see me. after a few minutes, a nurse comes in with this stuff she says "it's mainly used for diabetics, but it also helps relax the esophagus, maybe it'll help it pass." so she shoots me up with this stuff, and about 10 minutes later, i'm gagging myself again and "PLOP" out comes this (i swear to God) 3 oz. hunk of meat (make an "ok" symbol with your hand... it was roughly that big). i'm like "holy fuck, really?"
so yeah, long story short, i have more respect for women, because i gave birth through my mouth today...
