Like multiple of three shits.
lol it must suck to be an OCD dump taker.
Anyway. I take a shower once every morning, except on Saturdays where I shower once in the morning and then again in the evening to get myself all smells good before a night of whoring. I always wash my hair first and work downward. It usually takes less than 10 minutes. I can wash my hair everyday because it's thin, flat, and oily and NEEDS to be washed everyday to avoid the vagrant-look.
I brush my teeth at least twice a day, morning and night, and then sometimes more if I've eaten something with onions or garlic. I rarely floss. I wash my face before I go to sleep. I'm fortunate enough to rarely get acne, but when I do, it's usually on my chin. Must be from all the times I stroke my invisable beard whilst pondering deep thoughts.
I wash my hands after using the restroom, and if I touch something that smells weird or is sticky. I enjoy coming out of the restroom with hands still damp from washing, touch my brother on the face, and say, "I DIDN'T WASH MY HANDS!".
I don't own chickens, but my neighbors do. They have a rooster as well. It is the most obnoxious creature.