1
This year is the one year where my birthday is/has basically taken me by surprise.
I'm usually good about knowing about my own birthday when it's coming up, but I've had several occurrences where someone has been like, "When's your birthday?" and I'll say "December 5th" and they'll be like, "so in, 1-2 weeks or so, right?" and every time I've just been, "oh shit, yes, it's that soon."
Craziness. Used to be that I've always been pretty hyped up 3 weeks before my birthday. now it's 2 days before my birthday and I'm just kinda "meh".
I think it might be because Erik's still unemployed, I'm still unemployed, so we've been broke since September. It sucks.
I'm not expecting much this time around, but oddly I'm at peace with that fact.
I mean, there isn't even truly anything am I DYING to have.
If I had to make a list, it'd be something of a birthday-and-Christmas wishlist of sorts. Even then, the list is probably more unobtainable than not.
Wishlist:
I just kinda feel like I've stopped caring I guess. I've been in this low spot for quite a while that it's sorta sucked away any potential "HYPE HYPE HYPE" energy I've needed/used to have for specific things.
Oh well.
I'm usually good about knowing about my own birthday when it's coming up, but I've had several occurrences where someone has been like, "When's your birthday?" and I'll say "December 5th" and they'll be like, "so in, 1-2 weeks or so, right?" and every time I've just been, "oh shit, yes, it's that soon."
Craziness. Used to be that I've always been pretty hyped up 3 weeks before my birthday. now it's 2 days before my birthday and I'm just kinda "meh".
I think it might be because Erik's still unemployed, I'm still unemployed, so we've been broke since September. It sucks.
I'm not expecting much this time around, but oddly I'm at peace with that fact.
I mean, there isn't even truly anything am I DYING to have.
If I had to make a list, it'd be something of a birthday-and-Christmas wishlist of sorts. Even then, the list is probably more unobtainable than not.
Wishlist:
- For Erik to get a nice job that doesn't stress him out or fuck him over.
- For me to get a job, preferably where Erik would work because I have no form of transportation here still
- To talk more to my own parents, since I barely talk to my mom and I haven't talked to my dad in... 3 years or so? Coming up on 4? Geez..
- The Hunger Games book trilogy, in hardback. I owned it before. I bought every book when it came out and finished them all within 3 days of release. I just have a lot of good memories of that specific book trilogy. I gave the first one to my favorite high school English teacher. My father LOVED the book series and we kinda bonded over that. My father and I were bookworms but he always stole from my personal library, and I was rather proud of that.
- The Hunger Games movies, maybe. Normally I avoid watching movie adaptations of books at ALL costs, but my best friend persuaded me to watch the first one during my first year in college, and I actually loved it for the most part. I watched the second one on Netflix recently and thought it was pretty great too. Still haven't seen Mockingjay part 1, though. I guess for this I'd rather wait till all 4 movies are on blu-ray.
- Dragon Age: Inquisition Inquisitor's Edition. I'd basically been on the hunt for this many months ago, but it's been sold out for forever. What I'd do to get my hands on one, though...
- A hat rack. I kinda sorta have had this growing hat collection that started three or four years ago, but I've no place for all the hats. They're just a stacked mess, really.
- Bacon. No explanation needed.
- Happiness. I just want to get rid of this depression. I've been a slave to it my whole life. Pills are getting expensive, and frankly I just need to turn my life around. I've been a mess this whole year due to lack of productivity, but I'm stuck in this trench of "I want/need to do things but I can't because I don't have the means to do so". It sucks so bad.
- Motivation towards creativity, at least. I've been slacking so hard when it comes to practicing/refining my talents. I have this unbelievable desire to write write write, read read read, and draw draw draw. But video gamessss. Blargh.
I just kinda feel like I've stopped caring I guess. I've been in this low spot for quite a while that it's sorta sucked away any potential "HYPE HYPE HYPE" energy I've needed/used to have for specific things.
Oh well.
Happy Birthday in advance, and I hope that things do get a bit more smooth for you two! I could surely help with the bacon aspect of things (bacon is like it's own food group in our household, lol!). As for transportation issues, it may require juggling but should not be a complete brick wall to anything. Hubby and I work at different places...in entirely opposite directions...but have happily been commuting together for going on 5 years now in our soon-to-be-12-year-old car.
It's simply too expensive to own two cars where we live, and actually a large proportion of people hereabouts don't even own cars due to that fact. We totally thought commuting together would be a hassle and didn't look forward to it...but it quickly evolved into a nice bit of morning and evening "shared time" that we both treasure.