69 replies to this topic

[Magical]

Mine had been together about 25 years when my dad died. I think my dad always loved my mother a lot more than she loved him and they were coming to the end of the road though. Doubt they'd still be together now.

 

I'm so sorry to hear that Do you think they'd still be together for companionship though? My maternal grandparents don't get along - they don't fight, but they definitely don't have a romantic sense of love. They do 'need' each other, however.

[Ali]

I'm so sorry to hear that Do you think they'd still be together for companionship though? My maternal grandparents don't get along - they don't fight, but they definitely don't have a romantic sense of love. They do 'need' each other, however.

I hope not, I wouldn't wish my mother on anyone.

Staying with the Boy just because I feel the need to have someone around is my idea of absolute hell. If I'm not in love with him, I don't want to be married to him.

[Frizzle]

Parents have been together for about 32 years now, think my dad was forced into since he knocked my mum up with my sister

I assume they still love each other or they're just to lazy to look for other partners.

[Magical]

I hope not, I wouldn't wish my mother on anyone.

Staying with the Boy just because I feel the need to have someone around is my idea of absolute hell. If I'm not in love with him, I don't want to be married to him.

 

Yeah, that's I've always thought. Tbh, it's always seemed like pride, to not get a divorce. But it was hell going to stay there every now and then.

[Trichomes]

Unfortunately these days, it's just 'easier' for people to get a divorce than to try and work at their relationship. It's a bullshit 'scapegoat' imo. People should be made to attend some sort of counselling before being allowed to claim 'Irreconcilable Differences'.

 

I don't think anybody should be forced to remain in an unhappy or unhealthy relationship, regardless of how much effort they put into making it work. My parents attended therapy (both individually and as a couple) for years before calling it quits, and it only caused more tension that could have been avoided if they had gotten divorced sooner.

[Galadriel]

I don't think anybody should be forced to remain in an unhappy or unhealthy relationship, regardless of how much effort they put into making it work. My parents attended therapy (both individually and as a couple) for years before calling it quits, and it only caused more tension that could have been avoided if they had gotten divorced sooner.

 

I don't think Strat is saying that. I think he is saying that a lot of couples who can make it work give up. He isn't saying that all couples which gave up could have made it work.

[Trichomes]

I don't think Strat is saying that. I think he is saying that a lot of couples who can make it work give up. He isn't saying that all couples which gave up could have made it work.

 

That's not what I'm saying either...

 

I'm contesting the idea that married couples should be required by law to attend counseling before using 'irreconcilable differences' as a reason for getting divorced. If somebody feels their relationship is not working, they should be allowed to make the decision to end it. Sure, maybe some couples can work things out with the help of counseling, but sometimes it does more harm than good. Some people are aware that their relationship is doomed for one reason or another, and I think it's unfair to call them lazy for wanting to end things without trying counseling or "making it work" by other means.

[Emily]

My great grandparents, however, have been married for 75 years, and my grandparents have been married for 51. 

 

To add to this, yes they still love each other  I know this has nothing to do with my parents still being in love, but I can still have other love stories right?

 

My great grandparents got married when they were 15 and 17, which is probably how they've been together for 75 years. Right now, they're 92 and 90. My great grandpa is really close to the end and it's extremely hard to see.  I'm going to say that they still love each other - they'd probably be able to show it more if they weren't so old and ornery  

 

My grandparents. Man, these two will love each other until their last day, I swear. 51 years married (got married when they were 19 and 21), three kids, and eight grandchildren. My grandpa is so protective of my grandma - it's really cute. They built their house together - a huge three story house. I count the basement as a story because it has a whole other house underneath lol. They built this huge garden together. I don't know. They're just perfect for each other.

[Strategist]

That's not what I'm saying either...

I'm contesting the idea that married couples should be required by law to attend counseling before using 'irreconcilable differences' as a reason for getting divorced. If somebody feels their relationship is not working, they should be allowed to make the decision to end it. Sure, maybe some couples can work things out with the help of counseling, but sometimes it does more harm than good. Some people are aware that their relationship is doomed for one reason or another, and I think it's unfair to call them lazy for wanting to end things without trying counseling or "making it work" by other means.

Yeah I can see your point, fair call it's frustrating to see so many people not even try to fix things. I've seen it happen all too often in my life (through family friends etc) where the couple has given up all hope even before trying to work through things and then later on they end up regretting their decision after its too late.

[Bee]

My parents are still disgustingly in love after being married 24 years, and being together before that for 10 years. My dad's always sending her little love messages she takes great delight in reading to me word for word. They've had their ups and downs like every couple but they've managed to pull through and come out stronger for it. I think I've only seen them fight once, and my dad apologised the next day.

 

My grandparents have been together for something like 50 years, and even though my grandfather strayed and had a secret (not-so-secret-anymore) family with another woman, they're all good now.

[Mishelle]

No my parents broke up before I was born. They've moved on to equally as archaic relationships.

[Grimley]

My folks just celebrated their 47th anniversary in February.  

[Kaddict]

Let's be honest. The biggest question of this thread: How do old people find each other attractive?

[Grimley]

Let's be honest. The biggest question of this thread: How do old people find each other attractive?

 

Speaking on behalf of my definitely not-young self, I think there is a lot more going on in terms of shared life experiences and memories and just getting by together in life with someone who may have been a cute or pretty young whippersnapper that forms a bond far greater than many people in present times may have patience to forge. Or maybe they just aren't interested in it anymore...but the forces of attraction I see among old married couples, and those that I myself feel in my young marriage (though neither of us are chronologically young), are multifaceted. Did that make any sort of sense, or am I too sleepy to be typing?

[Fikri]

Let's be honest. The biggest question of this thread: How do old people find each other attractive?

 

[onlyme]

My parents split up when I was 18. I moved out, so that I didn't have to watch.

[luvsmyncis]

My dad died when I was three and for a long time my mom was alone or had short term boyfriends. I always figured she was just too wild and loud for any man to handle. Now she's been with this guy for 3 years. This guy she loved in highschool. Back then it seemed the feelings were not reciprocated, but after meeting up again these 30 years later, turns out he'd had feelings for her back then but was too much of a coward to pursue her. (To be fair, my mother is scarier than I am.) They are deeply in love, but no plans to marry.

If my father didn't die in an accident caused by his own ignorance, he probably would have eventually beaten my mother (or one of us kids) to death. That's not a joke. So. I guess things turned out for the best.

[Nanarie]

Hm, it's hard to say. My dad cheated on my mom, they bicker a lot, tend to act bitter towards each other, and have had some huge fights over the years that have been terrifying to watch. 

 

But I've also seen them joke around and relax together so I'm not really sure. I don't think they'd ever divorce, I guess they're at that point that most parents are at when they've been married for a long time where they're not in love with each other but they need each other's company or something I guess. 

[BEDDOEDv]

i will keep this short. my parents havent spoke to each other since i was 4 years old. i am 26 now.

[Chris12312]

"Still" seems to indicate that they ever were. They were married for 22yrs but would fight every day and then would tell me about how they only got married because my mom got pregnant and didn't want to look bad haha.