27 replies to this topic

[Bone]

RULES

Tell me the worst joke you know. Post it in this thread. You only get one entry.

 

You know it's a good entry if it makes you cringe, you know it's a winning entry if it makes you violently ill to say it aloud.

 

PRIZE

My eternal scorn.

 

DEADLINE

April 3.

[Swar]

So, worst as in offensive?

[Padme]

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him. A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

 

 

EHH EHHH

 

Edited by Padme, 27 March 2015 - 06:35 AM.

[lll]

mens rights activism

[Bone]

So, worst as in offensive?

 

Up to you.

 

 

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him. A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

 

 

EHH EHHH

 

 

 

What are you talking about, that joke is amazing and I tell it all the time.

[Irradium]

What's blue, and light?

 

Spoiler

Light blue.

 

Or:

Spoiler

Blue light

 

 

mens rights activism

 

As a privileged, white, English-speaking male, I am offended. Check your privilege, shitlord!

Edited by Irradium, 27 March 2015 - 08:08 AM.

[Swar]

What's worse than finding a baby in a dumpster?

Spoiler

Finding a baby in two dumpsters.

[Karla]

What types of bees produce milk?

 

Spoiler

Boobies

[lll]

where did the hot nun put the thick cucumber

 

Spoiler

with the rest of the ingredients for the salad

[Romy]

What's black and sits at the top of a staircase? 

Spoiler

Stephen Hawking after a house fire.

 

 

and here is my personal favorite (above is my entry though)

Spoiler

Where did Suzie go when the bomb exploded?

Spoiler

Everywhere.

[iKate]

Is it wrong that I find most of these jokes funny?

[CaptainDantes]

Whats red and green and red and green and red and green

Spoiler

A frog in a blender

@Irradium - I prefer: Whats brown and sticky?

Spoiler

A stick

[Padme]

[KaibaSama]

Why is the sky red?

Spoiler

I set fire to the rain.

I just made that up right now. It may not be very funny, I'm not good at jokes.

[Adam]

Myspace.

[Cyo]

Adam's height.

[Bone]

Only one day left! The current frontrunner blew you all out of the water.

[cara]

What did one ocean say to the other???

 

Spoiler

Nothing. They just waved.   

[Emily]

What did one plate say to the other plate?

Spoiler

Dinner's on me.

 

What do you call an anxious dinosaur?

Spoiler

A nervous rex.

[Oktober]

What's big, square and red?

 

Spoiler

A tiny green triangle.

[pancakeface]

What's worse than finding a baby in a dumpster?

Spoiler

Finding a baby in two dumpsters.

 

I've always heard that as "What's worse than finding 10 babies in a dumpster?"

Spoiler

Finding a baby in 10 dumpsters

 

 

My entry:
Why don't they have painkillers in Australian forest?

Spoiler

Because the parrots ate them all

Spoiler

ie paracetamol

Edited by argonate, 02 April 2015 - 05:38 PM.

[Swar]

I've always heard that as "What's worse than finding 10 babies in a dumpster?"

Spoiler

Finding a baby in 10 dumpsters

 

I translated the Portuguese version

[majestictuna]

Is it wrong that I find most of these jokes funny?

 

I've been sitting her giggling about all of these as well

[Prisca]

(In a New Zealand accent)

Why is six afraid of seven?

Because seven is a registered six offender.

[Bone]

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR ENTRIES. AFTER CAREFUL CONSIDERATION, I HAVE DETERMINED A WINNER...

 

Spoiler

 

Why is the sky red?

Spoiler

I set fire to the rain.

I just made that up right now. It may not be very funny, I'm not good at jokes.

 

CONGRATULATIONS, SATSUKI! You got bonus points for the fact that you made it up yourself; I couldn't do better (worse?) if I tried. Well done!

 

Thanks for participating, everyone!