1
Hey, I really need help with this. I'm using a few mature therms, idk ._.
Also, english is not my first language, I'm sorry about the mistakes.
I broke up a 7 years old relationship around 4 months ago and was really hard to get over this. I'm obviously needy and get attached to anyone who shows me any kind of affection, because i'm pathetic.
I met a girl 3 weeks ago on tinder, her description said she was there only to "feel pretty with matches because she was dating". Ok. We started talking and things escalated really quickly, like... REALLY. Her gf is from another state, so they don't see each other a lot. We will call the girlfriend "M" and the girl i'm going out "B".
On the first week we were talking about our life problems, that kind of think you DON'T TELL to somebody you just met on tinder.
Second week: we met in person, had lunch 2 times that week and... I was already feeling I was going to get hurt because even if she said she would date me if she was single, she wasn't. To make things worse: she said she was "touching herself thinking about me". Yes. This kind of thing... also that she wanted to take off my clothes.
Third week: Her gf came to our town, because she was pissed off about me. Yes, B told M about my existence, that we met on tinder and were talking to each other. M was here from friday to sunday that week. B didn't stop texting me, M saw that. When M was taking the bus to go back to her town, B sent me a message asking me to go out with her on the next day... Ok, that was fucking weird because her gf was taking the damn 8 hrs long trip to go home and B was asking me out.
We went to starbucks on the next day and she was teasing me, knowing that I couldn't do a damn thing. I did nothing because I couldn't and she was just being cruel. We said goodbye and I was really thinking that I would never talk to her again because she was going to hurt me more...
When I arrived home she started to text me, saying she was really sorry, that she shouldn't have acted like that. I ignored her until the next day, tueday, because I was fucking sad. She asked me to see her, so she could apologize.
So... well, I saw her, she hugged me, said she tried to push me away because she knew I was getting too attached and she was doing the same thing, and we could not let this happen... but she was really sorry about how she talked to me about the day before.
I... forgave her, but we fought a few days latter because she "realized" that she was using me to fill some holes in her relationship with M and I was really pissed off. Need to say that up to this point we did not do a single thing, not even a kiss, nothing. 2 days after this we started talking again... and we went from "we can't do anything because I date" to "i'm so fucking wet and I want you here". This was this weekend... september 6/7
Now, this week. We saw each other on starbucks again to talk because we talk A LOT and I was sad about a few things with my life... After 2 hours we were there I took of my cardigan because... well, it was hot in there and she saw I was wearing a white dress without sleeves. After this she was almost taking off my clothes there and things were getting really obscene, so she asked me to go somewhere else where this kind of thing wasn't getting us in jail. We went and I really doesn't need to give details.
The problem is: I'm liking her, she is a fucking asshole with her gf, but I like her. I don't know how to leave this situation and I really need to, because she is not going to break up with M. Even if she did, I don't trust her. She sends me screen shots when she is fighting with her gf and it's really weird, she is talking to me as if I was her accomplice... How the hell am I going to live my life and let her go? Idk how to do this... Help, srsly. Please, don't think I'm the asshole here, please, please.
My mood this week is: listen to "i knew you were trouble" from Taylor Swift on repeat.
tl;dr version: We met. We had sex. I'm screwed. She's a fucking asshole.
Also, english is not my first language, I'm sorry about the mistakes.
I broke up a 7 years old relationship around 4 months ago and was really hard to get over this. I'm obviously needy and get attached to anyone who shows me any kind of affection, because i'm pathetic.
I met a girl 3 weeks ago on tinder, her description said she was there only to "feel pretty with matches because she was dating". Ok. We started talking and things escalated really quickly, like... REALLY. Her gf is from another state, so they don't see each other a lot. We will call the girlfriend "M" and the girl i'm going out "B".
On the first week we were talking about our life problems, that kind of think you DON'T TELL to somebody you just met on tinder.
Second week: we met in person, had lunch 2 times that week and... I was already feeling I was going to get hurt because even if she said she would date me if she was single, she wasn't. To make things worse: she said she was "touching herself thinking about me". Yes. This kind of thing... also that she wanted to take off my clothes.
Third week: Her gf came to our town, because she was pissed off about me. Yes, B told M about my existence, that we met on tinder and were talking to each other. M was here from friday to sunday that week. B didn't stop texting me, M saw that. When M was taking the bus to go back to her town, B sent me a message asking me to go out with her on the next day... Ok, that was fucking weird because her gf was taking the damn 8 hrs long trip to go home and B was asking me out.
We went to starbucks on the next day and she was teasing me, knowing that I couldn't do a damn thing. I did nothing because I couldn't and she was just being cruel. We said goodbye and I was really thinking that I would never talk to her again because she was going to hurt me more...
When I arrived home she started to text me, saying she was really sorry, that she shouldn't have acted like that. I ignored her until the next day, tueday, because I was fucking sad. She asked me to see her, so she could apologize.
So... well, I saw her, she hugged me, said she tried to push me away because she knew I was getting too attached and she was doing the same thing, and we could not let this happen... but she was really sorry about how she talked to me about the day before.
I... forgave her, but we fought a few days latter because she "realized" that she was using me to fill some holes in her relationship with M and I was really pissed off. Need to say that up to this point we did not do a single thing, not even a kiss, nothing. 2 days after this we started talking again... and we went from "we can't do anything because I date" to "i'm so fucking wet and I want you here". This was this weekend... september 6/7
Now, this week. We saw each other on starbucks again to talk because we talk A LOT and I was sad about a few things with my life... After 2 hours we were there I took of my cardigan because... well, it was hot in there and she saw I was wearing a white dress without sleeves. After this she was almost taking off my clothes there and things were getting really obscene, so she asked me to go somewhere else where this kind of thing wasn't getting us in jail. We went and I really doesn't need to give details.
The problem is: I'm liking her, she is a fucking asshole with her gf, but I like her. I don't know how to leave this situation and I really need to, because she is not going to break up with M. Even if she did, I don't trust her. She sends me screen shots when she is fighting with her gf and it's really weird, she is talking to me as if I was her accomplice... How the hell am I going to live my life and let her go? Idk how to do this... Help, srsly. Please, don't think I'm the asshole here, please, please.
My mood this week is: listen to "i knew you were trouble" from Taylor Swift on repeat.
tl;dr version: We met. We had sex. I'm screwed. She's a fucking asshole.
You just need to cut her out of your life, cold turkey. People like that will always keep trying to lure you in. She's missing something or likes to make her GF jealous. She is just using you. The only thing it seems to be doing for you is filling the loneliness temporary, but when she has a fit or plays games, you end up hurting more. Just cut her out completely, she will try to apologize, get mad, be sad, or do anything else to squirm her way back in, just don't let her. It's hard to do that, especially when it's nice to have someone to talk to, text, hug, etc with but it's just not worth it in the end. Sorry you even had to deal with someone like this, they're very manipulative and convincing, but again never worth it in the long run. Do yourself a favor and stop all contact.