36 replies to this topic

[Boggart]

So we all have our definition of someone who is a slut. And I mean male or female in this case. While I might seem like a slut, I'm from the internet aka I'm not a slut at all. Not in my books anyway. I feel like anyone who is in the double digits at the age of 23 or so is pretty easy.

Of course there are other factors like maybe you just started dating at 15 and had year long relationships each time... or some shit.

I ask this because someone in my choir (gay) has slept with over 40 men and "been" with over 100 (the 40 or so not included...). And he doesnt' think he's a slut. dafuq.

So just yeah, chat and shit.

[kidbit]

I think people should do with their body whatever they want to. and nobody is a slut for that.

[Boggart]

I think people should do with their body whatever they want to. and nobody is a slut for that.

Sure, that's one opinion, but if I find out someone has slept with 40 people, I'd be intimidated/scared to ever be with them.

[kidbit]

Sure, that's one opinion, but if I find out someone has slept with 40 people, I'd be intimidated/scared to ever be with them.

why? (I'm not being agressive, I just want to know your opinion)

[Boggart]

why? (I'm not being agressive, I just want to know your opinion)

Seeing as I've been with so few people (fewer than a whole hand)

1) They must know SO much about sex and I doubt I'd ever compare with them (whether with sexual activity or just attractiveness)
2) They might be filled with all types of AIDS (Being a homosexual male myself, that's actually not too ignorant of a thing to say)
3) I feel like they care about sex too much
4) I I feel like they'd only want me for sex then ditch me

[Sweeney]

I think people should do with their body whatever they want to. and nobody is a slut for that.

[Alodielle]

Yes, of course, but can that be extrapolated to relate to the archetype of the social animal?

[Galadriel]

Bone

[Yung]

I considered myself a slut, I've not been with 40 people though. I didn't start having sex till I was 17, I only had sex with two girls until I was 21 and then from 21 to 22 1/2 I was with 27 if we're counting Napiform. So... on account of that I had considered myself a slut. Since Napiform and I started dating I have since quit having sex with other people and my number still stands at 29 total (counting the 2 from 17-21). I don't consider myself a slut of any kind now since I'm not having sex with everyone like I was before.

This may be one of those, you only consider yourself a slut if you're being slutty at that point in time/point in your life. Then again this might just be me, though it would be interesting to see if anyone else can say that they've exhibited similar feelings towards that term.

[artificial]

Personally I find girls that sleep around a lot a turnoff. Fine for a quick fling, but I wouldn't really want to go out with anyone like that for a prolonged period of time.

[Pilot]

Everyone who has less sex than me is a beta. More than me, a slut.

[Frizzle]

I think people should do with their body whatever they want to. and nobody is a slut for that.

[8143FF763271]

I think that it's unfortunate that the word slut carries negative connotations or whatever, but I also think it's dumb as shit to pretend that the concept doesn't/shouldn't exist. Is it bad that we look at people negatively for sleeping with a lot of people? Sure... Does that prevent them from being sluts? No. I've seen this a lot in feminist literature, and it's this unwillingness to acknowledge and deal the patriarchal valuations of our culture. Going so far as to redefine "virginity" or "slut" because the connotations of the terms don't please them. It's a word that means you sleep with a lot of people. Get over it.

With that said, I don't really give a fuck. All women are sluts in my view.

[Galadriel]

I considered myself a slut, I've not been with 40 people though. I didn't start having sex till I was 17, I only had sex with two girls until I was 21 and then from 21 to 22 1/2 I was with 27 if we're counting Napiform. So... on account of that I had considered myself a slut. Since Napiform and I started dating I have since quit having sex with other people and my number still stands at 29 total (counting the 2 from 17-21). I don't consider myself a slut of any kind now since I'm not having sex with everyone like I was before.

This may be one of those, you only consider yourself a slut if you're being slutty at that point in time/point in your life. Then again this might just be me, though it would be interesting to see if anyone else can say that they've exhibited similar feelings towards that term.

Since you decided to give a life story, I assume we are invited to comment:
no wonder you have 3 kids at 23.

Edited by cronus, 27 September 2012 - 05:02 AM.

[luvsmyncis]

I've seen this a lot in feminist literature, and it's this unwillingness to acknowledge and deal the patriarchal valuations of our culture. Going so far as to redefine "virginity" or "slut" because the connotations of the terms don't please them. It's a word that means you sleep with a lot of people. Get over it.

Well, the negative connotation usually comes with a woman being promiscuous. If a man goes out and screws everything in sight, it doesn't have the same negative qualities as a woman going out and screwing everything in sight. Society looks down on women with multiple partners, but when men sleep around, it's seen as an achievement. He has conquered, while his female counterpart has degraded herself. He is seen as a stud, and she is seen as easy. It's really unfair to women, and humanity in general.

An example I'd like to use is Kristen Stewart. It's well known that she cheated on Edward Cullen with some ugly, balding married man. Although both of them are to blame for the act, she is the one deemed a homewrecker. Leann Rimes and her disgusting Eddie Cibrian cheated on their respective partners with each other, but in the general view, she is the one carrying the negative weight. The only famous slut I can think of who doesn't carry this public shame is Cher. That bitch does what she wants, when she wants, and makes no apologies. Get it, Cher.

Anyone who sleeps with more than one person can be labeled a slut. My mom has 4 kids from three different men. What a ho, right? I have had only one sexual partner in my life, and since I don't meet the criteria of being a slut, people might label me as prudish. Or a weird lesbian. The point is, they are just labels coming from an outside view, and not how I personally feel about myself. When we joke about my mom being a slut, she just cheers and says, "YEAH! I WAS YOUNG AND ALIVE! WHOOOOO!"

Get it while you're young, folks.

[Frizzle]

I have had only one sexual partner in my life, and since I don't meet the criteria of being a slut, people might label me as prudish.

But you sucked 37 dicks right?

[Drakonid]

Well, the negative connotation usually comes with a woman being promiscuous. If a man goes out and screws everything in sight, it doesn't have the same negative qualities as a woman going out and screwing everything in sight. Society looks down on women with multiple partners, but when men sleep around, it's seen as an achievement. He has conquered, while his female counterpart has degraded herself. He is seen as a stud, and she is seen as easy. It's really unfair to women, and humanity in general.

It's only seen by other men as an achievement, women do judge men who sleep around just like they judge women who do.

[8143FF763271]

Well, the negative connotation usually comes with a woman being promiscuous. If a man goes out and screws everything in sight, it doesn't have the same negative qualities as a woman going out and screwing everything in sight. Society looks down on women with multiple partners, but when men sleep around, it's seen as an achievement. He has conquered, while his female counterpart has degraded herself. He is seen as a stud, and she is seen as easy. It's really unfair to women, and humanity in general.

An example I'd like to use is Kristen Stewart. It's well known that she cheated on Edward Cullen with some ugly, balding married man. Although both of them are to blame for the act, she is the one deemed a homewrecker. Leann Rimes and her disgusting Eddie Cibrian cheated on their respective partners with each other, but in the general view, she is the one carrying the negative weight. The only famous slut I can think of who doesn't carry this public shame is Cher. That bitch does what she wants, when she wants, and makes no apologies. Get it, Cher.

Anyone who sleeps with more than one person can be labeled a slut. My mom has 4 kids from three different men. What a ho, right? I have had only one sexual partner in my life, and since I don't meet the criteria of being a slut, people might label me as prudish. Or a weird lesbian. The point is, they are just labels coming from an outside view, and not how I personally feel about myself. When we joke about my mom being a slut, she just cheers and says, "YEAH! I WAS YOUNG AND ALIVE! WHOOOOO!"

Get it while you're young, folks.

Why is this a reply to me? I didn't need or invite the lecture which is pretty myopic, btw. I think that society is generally unfair to women but women have been exploiting their sexual group boycott forever. This is why women are often the most indignant against "sluts". The fact that people will, socially and romantically, reward you greatly for being sexually prudent is something that can put any pretty girl willing to sacrifice the choice of being promiscuous in a Mercedes. Men don't have and have never had that option so there's always a flip side to a "double standard". Men price female sexual exclusivity greatly and are wiling to sacrifice a great deal for it. Few women are willing to buy you a car if you're faithful to them. The "double standard" is a logical consequence of deeper sexual conventions and valuations in our society.

But... really, all girls are sluts. Some just hide it better than others.

[Nymh]

But... really, all girls are sluts. Some just hide it better than others.

You've said this so many times. Care to explain?

As to the Mercedes comment, if my partner ever thought to secure or reward my exclusivity to him with gifts or money, I would be offended and feel like he saw me as a cheap whore. People give each other gifts (men AND women) for reasons other than simply to buy exclusive rights to their genitals.

[8143FF763271]

You've said this so many times. Care to explain?

As to the Mercedes comment, if my partner ever thought to secure or reward my exclusivity to him with gifts or money, I would be offended and feel like he saw me as a cheap whore. People give each other gifts (men AND women) for reasons other than simply to buy exclusive rights to their genitals.

If you say so... lol. I like looking at things soberly. If you fall for the veneer of decorum that guises the transaction for sexual exclusivity that we call romance, that's your thing.

Every woman is a slut in the sense that women, like men, are perceptually horny, need sexual satisfaction, want increasingly better sexual partners, care for, need, and crave sex and would, ideally, get it from various people but will rather put up a front of asexuality and prudence in order to conform to an artificial construct of the "ideal" woman as dictated by patriarchal society. Better illustrated by the popular dictum of "treat a queen like a whore", the most prudent of women are nothing but neurotically repressed sexuality waiting fervently for a release. The concept of a nice girl is an act historically put up by women in order to inflate the price of their vagina in a society that systematically restricted them from other means to their sustenance than sexual bargains with men. Hence, why as soon as women started making money they started being more vocal about their sexual needs.

[Nymh]

If you say so... lol. I like looking at things soberly. If you fall for the veneer of decorum that guises the transaction for sexual exclusivity that we call romance, that's your thing.

Every woman is a slut in the sense that women, like men, are perceptually horny, need sexual satisfaction, want increasingly better sexual partners, care for, need, and crave sex and would, ideally, get it from various people but will rather put up a front of asexuality and prudence in order to conform to an artificial construct of the "ideal" woman as dictated by patriarchal society. Better illustrated by the popular dictum of "treat a queen like a whore", the most prudent of women are nothing but neurotically repressed sexuality waiting fervently for a release. The concept of a nice girl is an act historically put up by women in order to inflate the price of their vagina in a society that systematically restricted them from other means to their sustenance than sexual bargains with men. Hence, why as soon as women started making money they started being more vocal about their sexual needs.

So when I buy gifts for my friends, to bring them pleasure which brings me pleasure, am I asking them for a ticket to ride their crotch? I concede that some people buy gifts to ensure exclusivity, but that can't be applied to all gift-giving in monogamous relationships.

Would all men not be sluts too, then, by your definitions? Why the need to place this label only on women? You seem to degrade women a lot for someone who is constantly bringing up the patriarchal aspects of society.

[Drakonid]

Yes you are.

[8143FF763271]

So when I buy gifts for my friends, to bring them pleasure which brings me pleasure, am I asking them for a ticket to ride their crotch? I concede that some people buy gifts to ensure exclusivity, but that can't be applied to all gift-giving in monogamous relationships.

Would all men not be sluts too, then, by your definitions? Why the need to place this label only on women? You seem to degrade women a lot for someone who is constantly bringing up the patriarchal aspects of society.

Because slut is a concept reserved for women. The way our courtship is set up, men are the purveyors of sex and women the suppliers. In our society, a man being able to get a lot of pussy is seen positively so a term with the connotations of 'slut' would be inappropriate.

Though it is fair to say that things are changing and terms like "manwhore" are used negatively to refer to men, clearly a testimony to changing sexual norms and the emergence of heightened STD awareness, which added value to male sexual exclusivity.

I think that people can buy gifts for a plethora of reasons. However, when people recurrently buy each other gifts within given contexts, it's a pattern that merits study and there's probably more to it than plain old goodwill. In monogamous couples, the girl is the recipient of most gifts and the man has to put down a significantly larger financial input into the relationship, which he solely reserves for his sexually exclusive romantic interests (he doesn't waste as much on whores/friends as he does on his wife).

Speak for y'all self. I'm not from a patriarchal society.

I've heard the most ridiculous patriarchal flap-talk from you. Venerating femininity which is, in essence, the embodiment of female servitude, is as patriarchal and sexist as it gets.

Edited by Khaligula, 27 September 2012 - 07:42 AM.

[Sweeney]

Nymh, do not be expecting a disproportionate financial input into your gifts.