84 replies to this topic

[Jozie]

I am all for breast feeding in public. There is no shame in breast feeding in public. I will do it!

[cara]

For modesty. Same reason I'd rather poop in private even though it's natural and I'm not ashamed to poop and know others poop.

Pretty sure baby wouldn't care if it was eating under a drape.

I totally get where you're coming from, when you look at it in a general sense of all bodily functions. But when you break it down specifically, I don't think you can compare excrements with food.

One is repulsive because human waste is toxic to us. But breast feeding should not be repulsive simply because people have sexualized breasts. I think that's the argument for me, at least. I'm sure others will have different opinions. Breasts don't excrete waste, they produce food. So we should not be repulsed in the same way as we are with shit.

[Katya]

There's still hope though, from what I was able to gather this last days, there a lot more people supporting the breastfeeding of the kids (whenever it has to happen) than the ones that are against it. And the ones who are against it won't be in this world much longer, if you know what I mean. I also noticed that the people that are so vehemently against public breastfeeding are the same ones that are against homosexuals, women rights, surrogacy (damn, it's been such a productive week for ignorance shaming lol), and pretty much everything that only matters for the people involved in the issue, and possible even rainbows.

 

 

 

 

Just some sort of update on this. I had an argument with this dude, it was... enlightening on the worst possible way. He said how gross it was to watch this one woman every day in the bus he takes to work because and I quote "as soon she sits her ass she slaps her tit out of her blouse and shoves it in the baby's mouth, but the worst is when the baby burps and everyone has to hear it", and by the end of it, he started to say women breastfeeding the kids in public is one of the MANY causes of the sexual objectification (?) of the female body and it's all women's fault. That's when I realised I had to stop arguing with someone with the sensibility and wisdom of a rock.

 

 

 

 

 

I'll never understand why people always bring penises into this topic. Unlike pensies, breasts provide babies with food. Breasts are just a secondary sexual characteristic and not a primary one. If we all need to cover up all of those secondary ones then guess what my friends, it's time to shave your beards off and wear a scarf to hide your adam's apples. Can't have those out and about now can we :V

 

Fact: only men mentioned penises when trying to justify their views on this topic (because that's the only thing that matters to them lol). Women that are against it, usually compare the act of breastfeeding to "walk in the middle of the street naked awaiting to be arrested".

 

 

 

 

 

Honestly I probably shouldn't have said anything, I knew I'd get some flak over this.

 

People just have comfort levels over different things. My point was that I personally am uncomfortable over the idea of my wife doing it, but I'm not about to impose that on anyone. I believe public breastfeeding should be allowed and they shouldn't be harassed, I just personally would prefer my wife not do it. I'm not imposing my view onto any strangers, and I'm just minding my own relationship. Relationships are all about compromise.

 

Anyway, it's not like I meant a woman needs to get her husband's approval to do it or something, it's just common practice in relationships to avoid doing things that make the other uncomfortable. I thought that sounded reasonable.

 

Serious question: if it were today, would you ask your wife to cover herself and the baby? 

 

Aren't there private areas that she could?

 

We have "breastfeeding rooms" here but it's something so rare you can only see it in companies that usually also have kindergartens (which, in Portugal, are very, very rare). Some health centers (uh clinics?) have what they also call breastfeeding rooms but it's just an empty room with a chair and a gurney if you're lucky. 

 

 

 

 

to people saying we should feed our babies in the bathroom.
2) Would you want to eat where someone shits?

 

Holy shit (huehue), the amount of people that wrote something like that. "Why don't women go feed the kid in the diaper-changing room in the bathroom?" when referring to some public places like malls. Dude, do you eat in your bathroom? Why should a baby do it? 

 

 

 

 

 

All for public breastfeeding but I would prefer mom uses one of those drapes.

Why? What function does it serve? Have you ever eaten under a blanket? Legitimately asking.

For modesty. Same reason I'd rather poop in private even though it's natural and I'm not ashamed to poop and know others poop.

 

Pretty sure baby wouldn't care if it was eating under a drape.

 

I won't ask why are you comparing this because others already did it.

But just so you know, babies care if they are covered or not. Speaking for personal experience with three kids, none of them liked do be covered or not having a visual contact with my face specifically, especially in the Summer. Who the hell wants to have their head covered while eating? Babies are humans with preferences and things that annoy/stress them.

[Coops]

For modesty. Same reason I'd rather poop in private even though it's natural and I'm not ashamed to poop and know others poop.

 

Pretty sure baby wouldn't care if it was eating under a drape.

You're comparing a baby eating to you pooping. Do you eat where you poop? Do you hide yourself away when you eat for modesty? No? Another legitimate question, why do you dehumanize babies to the point of being like a dog/cat? Do you think that just because they are younger and less capable of abstract thought that we should change how we treat them?

 

Actually, they do care. I've known several breast feeding mothers who couldn't get their kids to latch under a drape, especially during the hotter seasons. 

[Katya]

Man, every time I think about the women screaming (because they're already in that age) "COVER YOUR KIDS' HEAD AND YOUR BREASTS, IT'S A FAVOUR YOU'RE DOING TO THEM. THEY WILL BE MORE CALM AND THEY WON'T BE THE TARGET OF CURIOUS EYES."

Well, lady, I'm so glad you know what's best for my kids. GTFO.

[Sorbet]

How does eating equate to taking a shit?

 

The point here is that you shouldn't have to hide yourself in order to do this. You shouldn't have to do certain things in order to prevent being harassed for feeding your child, you shouldn't have to use formula/breast pump if you don't want to, you shouldn't have to do whatever else. There should be absolutely no issue with naturally feeding your baby in public

lol ok I don't care enough about this issue to argue about it. Just making a comparison between two natural bodily functions where modesty doesn't equate to shame.

[Coops]

lol ok I don't care enough about this issue to argue about it. Just making a comparison between two natural bodily functions where modesty doesn't equate to shame.

One is eating. One is pooping. They are not really the same just because they are 'bodily functions'. And modesty does equal shame; that's literally the point of modesty.

[Turnip]

lol ok I don't care enough about this issue to argue about it. Just making a comparison between two natural bodily functions where modesty doesn't equate to shame.

 

Do you cover yourself while eating?

[Adam]

If you're comparing the act of pooping to the act of breast feeding, and saying they're any sort of similar beyond a normal body function, you're an idiot.

[Coops]

Also, using the guise of modesty is silly, considering people have all different definitions of modesty. There is no universal guideline for proper, decent and modest. That's exactly why it equates shame.

[Jozie]

Clearly this is a hot topic and a good debate, but please let's not call people names or make assumptions. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, which is the point of this debate. So, let's not gang up on anyone. Name calling is not productive. Just simply agree to disagree.

[cara]

lol ok I don't care enough about this issue to argue about it. Just making a comparison between two natural bodily functions where modesty doesn't equate to shame.

 

I agree that modesty doesn't necessarily equate to shame (ie I tend to cover up and dislike wearing shorts because of the amount of skin shown, but not because I am ashamed of my body in any way shape or form).

 

But, you are still comparing feces with food. One is natural to be repulsed by as it is toxic to humans. The other is only repulsive to you because breasts have been sexualized.

[Katya]

lol ok I don't care enough about this issue to argue about it. Just making a comparison between two natural bodily functions where modesty doesn't equate to shame.

 

Well, you certainly care enough because you posted here and gave your opinion

 

 

 

Clearly this is a hot topic and a good debate, but please let's not call people names or make assumptions. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, which is the point of this debate. So, let's not gang up on anyone. Name calling is not productive. Just simply agree to disagree.

 

And this wasn't even created to the purpose of being a debate haha xD

[Waser Lave]

I'm fairly sure if it was men who had to breastfeed we'd be whipping them out and doing it all over the place without a thought for anybody's else's judgement so I don't have an issue with it as long as the mother is comfortable.

[Jozie]

@Katya oh I know, but it turned into one. And there's nothing wrong with that, but I was just trying to reel it in a little, I guess.

[Ladida]

I agree that modesty doesn't necessarily equate to shame (ie I tend to cover up and dislike wearing shorts because of the amount of skin shown, but not because I am ashamed of my body in any way shape or form).

 

But, you are still comparing feces with food. One is natural to be repulsed by as it is toxic to humans. The other is only repulsive to you because breasts have been sexualized.

This perfectly expressed what I wanted to say. I had held off because I had no idea how to phrase it so calmly

[cara]

This perfectly expressed what I wanted to say. I had held off because I had no idea how to phrase it so calmly

 

I'm glad I could get both of our feelings across. 

[Generic]

Honestly people, this thread is getting really aggressive. No one here has even said they're completely against it or that it shouldn't be allowed, anyone who is the slightest bit uncomfortable with it in specific cases are getting completely fried by the entire thread.

Relax people. This isn't even in the debate forum. No need to have every person in the thread shut down anyone who disagrees even in the slightest. That's like exactly why I started that thread on passiveness; it seems impossible to have anything resembling a dissenting opinion nowadays without having the entire crowd (or thread) eat you up and then once you've been shut down, just nod at each other and continue talking about how wrong the other point of view is. I might be projecting a bit here, as I have a lot of friends who are wildly steadfast in their views, but it's just always unnerving to me when people can't disagree without being devoured.

 

Keep in mind, this is coming from someone who agrees public breastfeeding should be allowed. Just chill on the people who disagree.

Edited by Generic, 26 July 2016 - 03:28 PM.

[Coops]

Honestly people, this thread is getting really aggressive. No one here has even said they're completely against it or that it shouldn't be allowed, anyone who is the slightest bit uncomfortable with it in specific cases are getting completely fried by the entire thread.

Relax people. This isn't even in the debate forum. No need to have every person in the thread shut down anyone who disagrees even in the slightest. That's like exactly why I started that thread on passiveness; it seems impossible to have anything resembling a dissenting opinion nowadays without having the entire crowd (or thread) eat you up and then once you've been shut down, just nod at each other and continue talking about how wrong the other point of view is. I might be projecting a bit here, as I have a lot of friends who are wildly steadfast in their views, but it's just always unnerving to me when people can't disagree without being devoured.

 

Keep in mind, this is coming from someone who agrees public breastfeeding should be allowed. Just chill on the people who disagree.

I can see how some people's words could be perceived as aggressive. However, keep in mind, through text tone is very difficult to discern. I say this as an autistic person who constantly misunderstands people, especially online. That isn't to invalidate your feelings - just pointing out while you might feel someone is being aggressive, that may not be how they intend to come off. 

 

I was asking legitimate questions, as were some others, to understand their thinking on the subject. I hardly think that constitutes "frying" someone.

[Katya]

@Generic my question was serious and genuine. I won't attack you if I disagree with you. I just want to know the other side of this issue to try to understand it, something I was never able to do with the people I've been discussing this issue. So, if you can, please answer? Healthy discussion and all that

[Coops]

Also, something I forgot to include in my post, there are a lot of folks here. So, if a lot of people share the same views and come here to share that, it could seem sort of like ganging up, when it's really just people posting here to express their views - sometimes without reading the posts already. Every day people tend to try to catch up on threads and stuff.

[Generic]

Alright. Guess it can just kind of seem like "frying" when anyone who disagrees is analyzed and expected to defend themself. You can't tell people not to post or share their opinion just because they don't want to explain themselves or debate it. "You" being third person, not intending to point fingers.

 

Serious question: if it were today, would you ask your wife to cover herself and the baby?

 

@Katya, to answer your question, yeah at the moment I'd at least ask her to. There's a lot of options: finding private spaces, using a cover, trying to be discrete about it etc. I think it's completely fair to at least discuss it with her and explore other options. It's just hard for me to wrap my head around my wife pulling a boob out in public. Like I said though, I'm not in a fathering mindset at all right now, so I expect this to change.

Edited by Generic, 26 July 2016 - 04:15 PM.

[cara]

Alright. Guess it can just kind of seem like "frying" when anyone who disagrees is analyzed and expected to defend themself. You can't tell people not to post or share their opinion just because they don't want to explain themselves or debate it. "You" being third person, not intending to point fingers.

Don't post controversial opinions on Codex without anticipating a mob of angry pitchfork wielding members coming after you. It's a horrible fact of this site now unfortunately.

[Adam]

Sluts these days...

[MozzarellaSticks]

Why? What function does it serve? Have you ever eaten under a blanket? Legitimately asking.

Peace of mind for the mother, I think. Not everyone is comfortable with that leve of exposure. The thing is, it should be a personal choice. If a woman wants a blanket, cool, if not, also cool.