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You god damned liar.


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#1 Sweeney

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 01:59 PM

Earlier on, I was spectacularly bored at work, writing up CPD request forms for courses I'm already booked on to. Thrilling.
But I got to thinking about lies, for some reason, and I figured it might make an interesting topic.

So what is the biggest, or worst, or funniest lie you've ever told?
Or just a regular interesting tale :p

One of my biggest ones must be lying about meeting people from the internet for the first time. It was the Codex trip to Thorpe Park. I told my Mum that I was going with school friends, when in fact I was going with four freaks that I'd never met.
I came clean when I got home, and since I'd survived, there was never a problem with internet people ever again.

Which is good, considering.

Edit: I forgot to mention, if you don't want to post them publically, you can submit them to the CodexSecret Tumblr. (Password: dontlookhydrogen)

#2 Nanarie

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 02:22 PM

I met my boyfriend on a maple story blogging site when we were like 12 and when I went to meet him for the first time in Hong Kong, I told my mom he was a friend from school that moved away. I'm pretty sure she knows by now that was a lie but she's never brought it up, so I assume she's just ignored the discrepancy. :p

#3 onlyme

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 02:57 PM

"I have a penis."

#4 Sweeney

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 03:00 PM

"I have a penis."


This is a topic for lies, not dirty secrets, Lisa.

Sheesh.

#5 onlyme

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 03:04 PM

Oh, my bad.

#6 Alodielle

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 03:14 PM

When I was a teenager, I scratched up my brand new car by unwittingly sliding it along a metal gate.

I drove it to my job, worked my shift, then came out with a coworker and pretended to be shocked at the damage. I "concluded" that someone backing out in the space next to my car must have done it without looking.

Told my parents the same story. They filed an insurance claim. Insurance company came out, looked at the car, verified my "conclusion," and promptly paid for the repairs. The body shop ended up having to replace the entire side panel.

No one ever found out.

#7 Tokio

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 03:17 PM

My mom makes me lie to our family doctor to get superstrongpainkillersofdoom for my stepdad, doctor likes me so always gives them to me >D and I've lied too much about meeting people from the internet u_u

Recently, went America twice this year and Amsterdam/France/Germany/Brussels. Last year was Dalian(china), Osaka and Arizona, etc... all the way back to 7 or so years ago, each time to meet online buddies from various online games. Planes, trains, cars and a cruise one time. Family thinks I'm just meeting friends who moved away for university. Being a girl, my mom would never have let me do something like that especially not travelling alone. I'd have to make these elaborate lies and set up friends to cover for me and carry on the story while I was meeting people. Next year going to Thailand then Toronto again, then driving to Cali. Nothing bad's ever happened, though she always says I'll be murdered and chopped up and put in a suitcase

I lied a ton in school too, since I gamed a lot/skipped class to go to the mall, but all my teachers seemed to like me and let me get away with lots. From grade 9-12 I got... excused(?) (where they don't count your test mark to the final grade) from several major/final exams- especially in math, since I was horrible at it. I also talked my teachers into letting me do online (online courses were only allowed for sick students) for a lot of courses like bio, chem, history, english, then lied about reading the textbooks/doing labs and only logged in to write the tests and essays. Powered through in a month or less per course, ended up graduating way before everyone and got accepted into uni super early :funone2: Did math, my worst subject, in 3 weeks and completed with barely an A, and have to say I retained absolutely nothing at all. They said I'd need math in the real world, it was a lie. Never used anything past like grade 9 math, ever. Closest I come to using math is freaking lenny conundrum :F

The school stuff was pretty bad and was stressful managing so many lies at once, but I don't regret it. I'd still be stuck in uni now or on a waiting list even if I didn't do all that, instead of making money and paying off the loans I needed for tuition in the first place. $40,000 or so left to pay ¬¬ didn't want to be those people in school til they are 28 just to get a job I actually enjoyed

#8 Juturna

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 03:34 PM

I remember last year or so, I was very very depressed and basically maniac, and just generally not a good person. I couldn't leave this internet forum due to addiction, so I ended up driving myself away by posting my outbursts was an act of a giant troll, and everything I did was to get attention.

There might be a bigger one than that, but I don't know.

#9 Nymh

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 04:04 PM

"Yes, I'm happy. Everything's fine." Haven't had to lie about that in a while. I won't let myself anymore, either.

#10 Frizzle

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 04:16 PM

Dunno about 9 inches

#11 trizzle

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 10:03 PM

This isn't a really big one but it's pretty funny. I hooked up with a guy at an Arctic Monkey's concert and then afterwards he was trying to get my phone number, facebook etc so I told him I didn't have any of those things because I was energy conscious and lived in an eco-commune ahahahhaa.

#12 kidbit

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 10:08 PM

This isn't a really big one but it's pretty funny. I hooked up with a guy at an Arctic Monkey's concert and then afterwards he was trying to get my phone number, facebook etc so I told him I didn't have any of those things because I was energy conscious and lived in an eco-commune ahahahhaa.


AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'm definitely using this one

#13 Galadriel

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Posted 19 October 2012 - 10:58 PM

I find it concerning that I cannot recall what the worst lie I have told is...

#14 Syntax

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 12:37 AM

"We're not together, we're just really good friends."

That's how I passed off me and my boy for about 2 years.

#15 Georgina

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 12:39 AM

Yes I'm a virgin.

#16 Sweeney

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 02:29 AM

This isn't a really big one but it's pretty funny. I hooked up with a guy at an Arctic Monkey's concert and then afterwards he was trying to get my phone number, facebook etc so I told him I didn't have any of those things because I was energy conscious and lived in an eco-commune ahahahhaa.


Best thus far xD
10 points.

#17 Honey

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 03:08 AM

I used to tell lots of lies just to disturb other people, like
"Oh, this flower is beautiful"
"I wouldn't touch it *serious face*. It's toxic. A month ago the neighbour's kid picked some of these flowers and when it licked its fingers after eating an apple it broke down with some seizures. I tried to call its mom but she was busy watching her movies and...."

... nothing really funny or worldshaking.

#18 Sweeney

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 03:16 AM

"It"?

#19 onlyme

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 03:23 AM

This isn't a really big one but it's pretty funny. I hooked up with a guy at an Arctic Monkey's concert and then afterwards he was trying to get my phone number, facebook etc so I told him I didn't have any of those things because I was energy conscious and lived in an eco-commune ahahahhaa.


Yes I'm a virgin.


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#20 Honey

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 03:38 AM

whaaat?
children ≠ it?

#21 luvsmyncis

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 06:07 AM

LMAO GEORGINA. You stole my answer. :/

I don't ever lie to people I truly care about. When I was 12,my mother discovered I told her a lie, and, like Kiwi, I realized it's so much better to be in trouble for the truth than getting caught in a lie. Because then the people you love won't trust you anymore.

But, anyway... I signed up for the 'tobacco free' portion of my health insurance because it's cheaper, even though it's very likely I have used a tobacco product in the past 3 months.

#22 Boggart

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 07:43 AM

I told my parents I have a girlfriend

#23 Pilot

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 08:47 AM

Honesty is the best policy :shifty:

#24 Jakerz

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Posted 20 October 2012 - 11:22 AM

"I don't lie."

#25 Shirwinator

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Posted 26 October 2012 - 09:10 PM

I find it concerning that I cannot recall what the worst lie I have told is...

I agree... I'm feeling the same way right now. It's very worrying.


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