Why would you not be alive?
Is this a cry for help?
I hope you're not kidding because that's a serious thing you're possibly exaggerating about.
Well, I'm serious about it. I'm super depressive, I don't like myself and I've suicide tendences.
You may ask for yourself Why I act like an idiot. Well, because I'm fucking sad IRL. The reasons are unknow, but all that people should know that I'm very depressive. I hate my life. Never I do goes right. I don't have skills. The only thing I know to do it's sleep.
Why I claim atention? Because I don't have from no one. My family is an good family, but they don't show affection towards me. I was all my childhood alone. I was all my adolescence alone. I've few friends that i love too much, but my mind isn't normal. I have thoughts about Kill myself, so I can have an outbreak one day and suicide. My emotions are very instable.
So, asking your question, I'm crying for help and welcome.
Why I act like an spoiled super happy character? Because that's the opposite of me. I'm not happy. That's because I'm an super hiperactive girl, because I don't want to be sad like today and yesteday. I act like an idiot because acting like this makes me laugh and being happy. When someones being kind with me, like @Aria
, @Kord or even someone that hates me, that makes me smile and get happy. The life isn't an green garden that I always dreamed, but I try to keep my viewing on it. It's silliness keep a fake vision about the life, but it's better dream with a happy life than the true life. Hide myself in my dreams works, that makes me forgot my true life issues. IRL, I'm hiperactive, but the people would thinks that I'm a moron, so I act like a shy girl in all places, don't talk too much, always keep in the normal line.
Here, in Codex, I act like Umaru-chan because it's a way to unburden all my problems IRL and keep smiling, because I like all of you Codexians, having few exceptions, but I love this place, it's welcoming and magical. Some peoples here care about others even knowing about them. That's because I'm what you guys know. You guys may think I'm annoying, but I'm changing and being another person, an calm and gentle girl, like I'm IRL.
Why I'm Umaru? To flee from my true nature and don't die by depression.
Edited by UMR, 12 January 2016 - 08:44 PM.