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Guys I'm at my wits end here.
My aunt has a son his name is Marc. He's 22 years old and he's spent his entire life living with his dad and his grandma. His dad never moved out of his mom's house really or was ever self sufficient. He went back and forth between living with his mom and living with my aunt when they were together. Their relationship was really toxic and abusive because he was a misogynist fuckboy. He almost set my aunt on fire once. After they broke up for good my aunt didn't have a place to live because they were all living in the house with his mother so he got custody of my cousin and my aunt had to pay child support. That's when my aunt moved in with my mom and me. Years later to today my aunt and I have an apartment together and my cousin and his dad are still living with grandma, neither of them have jobs or go to school or anything. I don't think his dad has had a job the entire time I've known him he basically lives off food stamps and government money for epilepsy. He claims he cant work because of the epilepsy even though we all know he's full of shit.
So grandma had a stroke, and now grandma can't work anymore. Since she couldn't work and no one living with her has a fucking job she was no longer able to pay the payments on her house. Because of that her house was foreclosed on. My aunts basically just told me that my cousin was moving in here. I agreed to let him move in because he's family I don't want him out on the streets with his dad and his shady ass druggie friends. But I was also under the impression that when my cousin got here he would actually act like a fucking adult and get a job. It's really not hard to get a job here. Lots of businesses are hiring, I have friends who have two jobs. He tries to blame the fact that he doesn't have a job because he doesn't have a car but that's total bs. Willie has two jobs and he doesn't have a car and this negro can't find one? The proof that he's not even looking is the fact that he hasn't even had an interview!
I feel like it's not my place to get on him about this because his mom is supposed to be doing this not me. I wasn't the one who invited him to live here, she did. And he's staying in her room so I know that has to be annoying to her. I just don't understand how he wouldn't want to do better for himself. If I was 22 years old having to sleep in the same bed as my mom every day I would be pressed as hell. I would want better for myself.
And what really grinds my gears is the fact that this little fucker has the nerve to try to act like some kind of mini MRA in training. He's constantly posting on Facebook about how women are sluts and whores. How women want to rule over men. And all of this macho bullshit. I call him out every time on it because you're not going to lay up in my fucking house, eat my fucking food, use my fucking internet to get online talking about how women aint shit. You can have an opinion when you pay some fucking bills around here. Women have been supporting him and his fuckboy dad all their lives and yet they have the nerve to speak out against women?! I don't fucking get it, and I'm not going to allow it under my roof. I told him if he keeps posting that shit on Facebook I will cut the entire fucking internet off because I pay the bill and I can do that.
I want to talk to my aunt about the fact that when I have my off days and she's at work he doesn't do anything but watch tv, go on the internet and run up our water bill taking 30 min showers. (WHAT DO YOU NEED A 30 MIN SHOWER FOR WHEN YOU DON'T DO SHIT? HOW SWAY? HOW?) but I don't even know how to bring it up. I don't even know how I can because he's literally in this house 24/7 and there's no way I can talk to her and get some damn privacy. Jesus.
What do I do? Because I can't anymore.
My aunt has a son his name is Marc. He's 22 years old and he's spent his entire life living with his dad and his grandma. His dad never moved out of his mom's house really or was ever self sufficient. He went back and forth between living with his mom and living with my aunt when they were together. Their relationship was really toxic and abusive because he was a misogynist fuckboy. He almost set my aunt on fire once. After they broke up for good my aunt didn't have a place to live because they were all living in the house with his mother so he got custody of my cousin and my aunt had to pay child support. That's when my aunt moved in with my mom and me. Years later to today my aunt and I have an apartment together and my cousin and his dad are still living with grandma, neither of them have jobs or go to school or anything. I don't think his dad has had a job the entire time I've known him he basically lives off food stamps and government money for epilepsy. He claims he cant work because of the epilepsy even though we all know he's full of shit.
So grandma had a stroke, and now grandma can't work anymore. Since she couldn't work and no one living with her has a fucking job she was no longer able to pay the payments on her house. Because of that her house was foreclosed on. My aunts basically just told me that my cousin was moving in here. I agreed to let him move in because he's family I don't want him out on the streets with his dad and his shady ass druggie friends. But I was also under the impression that when my cousin got here he would actually act like a fucking adult and get a job. It's really not hard to get a job here. Lots of businesses are hiring, I have friends who have two jobs. He tries to blame the fact that he doesn't have a job because he doesn't have a car but that's total bs. Willie has two jobs and he doesn't have a car and this negro can't find one? The proof that he's not even looking is the fact that he hasn't even had an interview!
I feel like it's not my place to get on him about this because his mom is supposed to be doing this not me. I wasn't the one who invited him to live here, she did. And he's staying in her room so I know that has to be annoying to her. I just don't understand how he wouldn't want to do better for himself. If I was 22 years old having to sleep in the same bed as my mom every day I would be pressed as hell. I would want better for myself.
And what really grinds my gears is the fact that this little fucker has the nerve to try to act like some kind of mini MRA in training. He's constantly posting on Facebook about how women are sluts and whores. How women want to rule over men. And all of this macho bullshit. I call him out every time on it because you're not going to lay up in my fucking house, eat my fucking food, use my fucking internet to get online talking about how women aint shit. You can have an opinion when you pay some fucking bills around here. Women have been supporting him and his fuckboy dad all their lives and yet they have the nerve to speak out against women?! I don't fucking get it, and I'm not going to allow it under my roof. I told him if he keeps posting that shit on Facebook I will cut the entire fucking internet off because I pay the bill and I can do that.
I want to talk to my aunt about the fact that when I have my off days and she's at work he doesn't do anything but watch tv, go on the internet and run up our water bill taking 30 min showers. (WHAT DO YOU NEED A 30 MIN SHOWER FOR WHEN YOU DON'T DO SHIT? HOW SWAY? HOW?) but I don't even know how to bring it up. I don't even know how I can because he's literally in this house 24/7 and there's no way I can talk to her and get some damn privacy. Jesus.
What do I do? Because I can't anymore.
I know that you feel like it is not your place to say anything about dude getting a job or something, but it totally is not OUT of your place. You pay bills there. You LIVE there and work. You have a say absolutely in what you expect of him. He should NOT be living there rent free (or bill free) and you have to suffer because this mfer is lazy and doesn't want to get out or do anything.
I think you need to tell him how it is, straight up.
If you are not comfortable with that, pull your aunt to the side. "Hey, come in the other room we need to talk"
Something like that. Explain to her that you are so frustrated with him and that since she invited him to move in, she needs to deal with his bullshit. Not you.