51 replies to this topic

[leptooners]

Last week, I was at the hospital because I was trying to become a live organ donor, and I picked just the right time to watch a 14 year old boy crash and die of skin cancer that spread to his brain. I was in the ICU having blood drawn for testing and such, when all of the sudden, like six doctors and nurses ran past me into the room directly in front of me. I watched as they tried to resuscitate the boy, because his heart had stopped due to the lost signal from his brain. If they were able to re-start his heart, he would have been brain dead. But they weren't,. so he was just dead.

While I was watching his mother and sister crying their hearts out, even though I didn't know what happened yet, I got up, pulled the tube out of my arm, and I walked into the room and just hugged them. I couldn't help it. I couldn't just sit there and watch a young boy die. We sat and cried for a good four hours before they finally went home.

Now I don't know what to do. I'm so disturbed by what happened, but I have no one to talk to. I don't have any real friends, and my man is emotionally incompetent. When I got home, I was watching TV with my mom, and I just randomly bursted out into tears. But I didn't tell her what happened because she would have worried too much like she always does.

Fuck... why do innocent young people have to die so pointlessly? FUCK now I'm crying again...

[luvsmyncis]

That was very kind of you to give comfort to the grieving family.
There's really nothing else I can say. Pretty heavy situation.

[Lineage]

I had a friend a few months ago get into a really bad crotchrocket accident, and the girl on the back of his bike died.
Scary, but scarier because originally I was going to head out with them that night but decided to stay home.

I think life is just like that, where unpredictable and emotional painful stuff just happens out of the blue.
Good for you for going to comfort the family, it sounds like they certainly needed it.

And you hang in there too, I think you should talk to your mom about the situation that happened.
It's never good to keep stuff bottled up.

[leptooners]

I had a friend a few months ago get into a really bad crotchrocket accident, and the girl on the back of his bike died.
Scary, but scarier because originally I was going to head out with them that night but decided to stay home.

I think life is just like that, where unpredictable and emotional painful stuff just happens out of the blue.
Good for you for going to comfort the family, it sounds like they certainly needed it.

And you hang in there too, I think you should talk to your mom about the situation that happened.
It's never good to keep stuff bottled up.

That's intense. I'm glad you decided to stay home. I want to talk to my mom about it, but she always worries too much and she'd prolly be more upset about it than I am. I don't want to upset her. My brother died last year of a heroin overdose, and now she might have cancer. So I don't want to pile any more stuff on her if I don't have to. She doesn't even know I want to be a living donor. I told her I was going to a friends house so she wouldn't try to talk me out of it.

Edited by leptooners, 25 October 2010 - 10:04 AM.

[xavarn]

I know how hard it can be to tell stuff to parents, trust me, I think they know much less about my life than my friends do.

So i mean I know it sounds like bad advice, but reach out to some freinds you have, even if they arent your best of freinds, i'm sure they will be more than willing to help you out. and who knows, maybe you will find your new best friend this way.

[iargue]

and my man is emotionally incompetent

Step 1. Get a better man.

[Noitidart]

Dang bro that's real nice of you. I know man it sucks.
In other places little kids are even shot at.
http://www.neocodex....es-relating-to/

[jcrdude]

My masculinity has made it difficult for me to emote properly when people die (unless they're fictitious, then I can BAWWW like a champ). For some reason, I've decided that the way to react to emotional trauma is to be completely level-headed and sane, and then I am able to lend a listening ear, offer a shoulder to cry on, give advice that isn't mired in emotional distress, etc. From a survival standpoint, I guess it's a good thing, but to not cry when my sister or dad died seemed off to me. In fairness, I provided the emotional support my family needed in both events, though, so I suppose it worked out ok.

I know my explanation of how I react to things may not be incredibly helpful, but I wanted to weigh in somehow and at least explain why I couldn't commiserate better

[leptooners]

Thanks for your concern everyone. I've talked to my mom and she didn't react nearly as badly as I expected.

In other news, I'm going to Boston to donate a kidney to a 48 year old man named Alexander Daneliants at Mass General Hospital. He has kidney failure caused by polycystic kidney disease. If you believe in God, please keep him in your prayers for the next few weeks. I'm an atheist, but it can't hurt right?

[MiladyM]

Thanks for your concern everyone. I've talked to my mom and she didn't react nearly as badly as I expected.

In other news, I'm going to Boston to donate a kidney to a 48 year old man named Alexander Daneliants at Mass General Hospital. He has kidney failure caused by polycystic kidney disease. If you believe in God, please keep him in your prayers for the next few weeks. I'm an atheist, but it can't hurt right?

Uh, that doesn't sound like you're an atheist. But okay. It's a great thing you're doing

[leptooners]

Uh, that doesn't sound like you're an atheist. But okay. It's a great thing you're doing

I'm just open minded. I can't know there isn't a god, but I can't know there is one. There's no real proof either way.

I'm gonna see if they can record the surgery so I can put it on youtube. lol

Edited by leptooners, 25 October 2010 - 09:25 PM.

[Sasha]

Then you're an agnostic . I used to be one as well.

Good luck with the surgery!

As for the boy you watched die, I understand you. I went through something similar and felt really affected afterwards, but whenever I tried to talk to people about it, they'd say things like: "he was a stranger to you, how come you suddenly care? get over it!" But there's nothing worse than not caring about something that's happening in front of your eyes, imo.

[Philly]

It is a very goodthing you did. Young people die too often, I've seen a good friend of mine die in a car accident just last year.. Hope you're feeling okay!

[Lineage]

Good luck with the donating process, and certainly let us know how it goes.

And like iargue said, get a better man because life is too short to have people waste your time.

[sonic]

Are you serious. Who are you to judge.

[redlion]

Are you serious. Who are you to judge.

I believe this would be the appropriate time for self reflection. You know what you did.

<-- That way to the corner. Stand in it.

[sonic]

I believe this would be the appropriate time for self reflection. You know what you did.

<-- That way to the corner. Stand in it.

In my defence, the girl is a bitch to me.

Secondly, I miss understood the OP.

[redlion]

In my defence, the girl is a bitch to me.

Secondly, I miss understood the OP.

Well, I don't really know what to say to either of those. Does not compute. Moar info required.

[sonic]

Ill cut my losses and ignore this entire topic

[Frizzle]

Shit happens. I know that's a cynical view, even by my standards but if I got emotionally involved in every sad case that passes my way, I wouldn't have enough time to do my job and live. If something happens to me personally, then we have a different story, but if I don't know that person, this kind of stuff just bounces off me.

[Charmender]

People die, thats life, well technically thats death but meh.

[luvsmyncis]

People die, thats life, well technically thats death but meh.

Yes, but it's always preferable they die someplace far far away instead of, you know... in the same room separated only by a thin hospital curtain.

[Derriere]

Sad to say some people couldn't read the sub title:


DON'T FUCKING REPLY IF YOU CAN'T SAY SOMETHING NICE

[luvsmyncis]

Sad to say some people couldn't read the sub title:
DON'T FUCKING REPLY IF YOU CAN'T SAY SOMETHING NICE

I'm certain we all read it. But asking people to only say nice things is practically begging for people to be dicks. It's the nature of the Internet. 

[Charmender]

Sad to say some people couldn't read the sub title:


DON'T FUCKING REPLY IF YOU CAN'T SAY SOMETHING NICE

Really? REALLY?

Dont expect anyone on the internet to follow the rules, the internet was basically designed for lulz